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View Full Version : Rap Battle: Kebert Xela vs. Bravado



Bravado
08-12-2010, 01:08 AM
The large font is Kebert's, the small font is mine.



Yo Bravado, got dat whack last name like ya just jumped da border

ya look like James LaBrie with an eating disorder

When it comes to my rhymes, I'm like a lady on Hoarders

I tried to ride yo mama but I ran out of quarters



I'm a straight-up G, yo a broke-ass ho

when you step up in da club, Atlas just says, "No."

While I'm screamin' out my Anthem on da bedroom flo'

Wonder why they call it "Fountainhead"? Well, now ya know.



You be thinkin', "I can't beat this rap!" Well, quit ya whinin'

I'll make you the Wendy to my Jack in The Shinin'

While you been playin' Pokemon I been dinin'

on yo goofy-ass lyrics, you best be resignin'.






Took you a long-ass time to compose twelve lines

Flashback, A.P., you scored sixes, I made nines

and my flow make ya chase me like Penelope, Amanda Bynes

You like Disney? Cool, now go Fantasia; make my shoes shine.



I run this shit like Dante runs the layers of hell

The only runnin' I seen from you is reruns of Kenan and Kel

You Notre DUMB, I heard Frollo yell for yo ass to get back and ring da bell

And you can shove that DT reference up yo Solitary Shell.



Get back in the kitchen, finish cookin' dat rice

'cause da rap game ain't for you; you drop lines like The Rescuers mice

In case you don't catch context clues, here's some advice:

Your rappin' sucks, so go, reroll, yo twelve-sided dice.



Well yo A.P. exam got a 3, I scored 4

and da proof is in my rappin', I ain't gotta say more

Man, ya look like da baby on The Cure's Galore

When you go to see Rush, Geddy say, "keep ya drawers".



Errybody hated ya in Oral Comm. class

spittin' whack game like a Bigmouth Bass

be wearin' all black, never goin' to mass?

Well then you must be Batman, 'cause I'm ROBIN yo ass!



And as for da Hunchback, call me Esmeralda

sexy, stickin' rhymes togetha like a hard-rap welda

I be flyin' JetBlue, you last-class Delta

and I'm thinkin' Link is missin' ya, so turn on ya Zelda.





Yo ass didn't know what A.P. was till I came along

Thought it stood for Asian Pussy so ya Googled John Myung in a thong

And if ya think you're The Real Slim Shady, yo Dead Wrong

so take yo B.I.G. ol' ass out; "Gong em, baby, Gong!"



Exam scores don't mean nothin' when yo failin' every quiz

I'm the published poet here, yo orange soda lost its fizz

and I don't gotta Make a Man Outta You; you already is

You such a loser, Beck and I seen you get crazy wit da Cheez-Whiz



A Nightmare to Remember, is how much I spit game

I'm comin' atcha like Tim Curry, bitch, I'm Wild and Untame

All I gotta do is rap to get money and fame

you out on da corner shakin' dat ass, yo momma don't even know yo name!

Word.

-insert chestbumps and handshakes here-