(August) Prompt #2 - Jagged Edges

[Chat Noir]

The second prompt of August is the phrase, Jagged Edges.

[Chat Noir]

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Happy writing!

[m139]

One might say that this story began with the changing of the boy to a man. In one way, it is so. But in another way, it began much, much, earlier with the aging of an old live oak tree.

The old tree was located deep in the woods, in the center of a medium sized clearing. Around it, but still at a respectful distance, the younger trees formed a ring around it. The ancient gnarled oak stood tall, proud, with trunk thick and branches high in the sky. Many birds had lived within those branches, and many squirrels had lived within its trunk. Underneath, in the mix of moss, grass, and ferns, the other forest animals had both slept and passed. But that was not all that was there: hidden among the live and dead leaves on the forest floor was a tiny acorn.

The acorn had been there for a while, covered in the half rotting mess above it for almost a year, Passed over by squirrels, and almost ready to rot itself, it was forgotten by everyone. That is, everyone but itself. For a while, it lay dormant, but then, when the moment was right, the seed burst open, and its small twin arms, tender and pale green, first reached towards the filtered light.

Protected by its mother's branching arms, fed by its mother's fallen leaves, the young seed began to grow. It sprouted up, as did many of its siblings. But as time passed, and seasons changed, the others withered. And their old leaves did not wait for spring to come, but some fell in the summer, others, when autumn came. They did not grow back. So, soon, it was only the single sprout that remained.

For a couple more years, it continued to grow, still with its mother. Bu even this did not last forever. For, as in anyone's life, death will always come. For the older tree, it came as a lightning strike. One day, it was fine. Then, the storm came.

It was late spring. A few brown leaves still clung to the branches of both trees, but for the most part, both were bare. The scraggly, uncovered arms both stretched up towards the sky, and the older one's topmost limbs seemed almost to scratch the dark, stormy clouds above. And when the wind began, first lightly, then harder, it really did seem to tear the clouds. And even if it was not the branches themselves, the clouds were torn, and the storm began.

It began, like any storm, with a light sprinkling of water. Plink, plink, plink. The water fell lightly on the leafs of the mother. After the drops filtered down through the mass of leaves and branches, they fell gently onto the young tree. Plink, plink, plink.

Then, the storm soon grew stronger. Soon, the drops were no longer light, but turned into a patter. And the patter grew into a constant roar. Added to this was the sound of the once-breeze, which was now a mighty storm wind, tossing the branches of trees this way and that. And through all of this, it was getting darker. So dark that it was impossible to tell one tree from another.

Then, suddenly,

BOOM!!!

Thunder sounded moments after lightning tore across the sky, illuminating the scene for a brief second. For an instant, one could see fallen limbs and exposed bark. Then, it was darkness again.

Again and again the thunder and lightning crashed. Though limb- and sometimes whole trees- were torn down around them, the mother oak and the child safe in its arm stood firm. Despite their tops being thrown this way and that by the upward elements, the roots were deep and true: their feet could not be moved.

And perhaps it was that reason, or maybe it was fate or even just chance that the fatal strike happened just after. For, in the deep of the storm, in its most wildest mood, it threw down another bolt of lighting.

BOOM!

There was no wait between the thunder and lightning. The ground shook, and the whole area was electrified as the lightning made contact with the earth. And the light illuminated the scene: light so bright you could hardly make out what was happening. Yet, even in that blinding glare, one could make out what had been hit. It was the mother tree.

CRACK! went the bark. The two halves of the tree held on for a brief second before splitting, both sides falling towards the ground. And the storm, seemingly satisfied, gave a few more bright flashes to shed light on the child tree now alone in front of what had been its parent. The wind swept around both once more, not as hard as before, but just enough to seem to mock the child and chide him for forgetting that none can withstand nature.

And then, the storm withdrew. Slowly, the clamor of the thunder became less and less audible. Slowly, the rushing wind died down to a gentle breeze. Slowly, the ceaseless roar of the rain subsided into a pitter patter, and then, it left, and only the drip-drip of already fallen rain was heard. And, in this new peaceful almost silence ness, a bird began to chirp cheerfully. The sun had come out again, and a beautiful rainbow spanned the once broken sky.

But on the ground, the old tree was still dead. One could see it now in full, lying there, exposed. And as one looked longer, one could see lightning was not the only cause of death: the trunk was rotted to the core. It would have died soon anyways, with or without the storm. The old tree would not regain leaves in the summer, not like its child would. It had left the child alone, with nothing but a final parting gift: itself. Its rotten shell would provide nourishment for seasons to come.

And it did. The tree grew and grew, taller and taller. It was young, healthy, and beautiful. And when a growing boy discovered it deep in the woods, he thought so too. He called his dad over, and together, with a saw, they chopped it down. The growing boy, now a man, was proud. He had chopped down his first tree. He had helped in the actual business. And the two of them, with the fallen tree, went away.

The stump remained. For seasons it stood there, bare and naked, with only the jagged edges caused by the saw scarring its top to remind it of its former glory.


Then, one day...

From the side of the stump came forth a tiny shoot, which soon unfurled a small, tender green leaf.

[Kiki]

Jagged Edges

All my jagged heart wanted was to chew someone up and abandon them like they did not matter.
Once it had done that, it was satisfied.
So am I satisfied?

No.

The sides of my heart have jagged edges.
I might as well be a thorny bush.
I lure those to get close, and then, like a defense
A mechanism
(Am I a machine?)
I force them away.

A name call
A catcall elsewhere
I push
Physically
Emotionally
Mentally –
Feet, hands, words, mouth
“Go away, leave me like you want to”

I say, I tell. Believing it to be true.
And when you feed someone words
Or thoughts
Like brainwashing,
Soon they think it’s true too.

So they leave. Like I expect.
And I fall into a despair, like I did not think it would happen.

But it happens.

All my jagged heart wanted was to chew someone up and abandon them like they did not matter.
Once it had done that, it was satisfied.
So am I satisfied?

No.

It’s been like this for a while. This back and forth kind of motion. I wonder if I flourish best in the unknown, even though it terrifies me. Keeps me awake at night. Makes me cry with fear of unforeseen events, or issues. I make details into catastrophes, running them over and over and over and over…

I wonder how I have not run myself into the ground yet.
I wonder when I will.
Not if, when.

Because you can only go so long, in this back and forth,
This endless cycle of believing, not believing,
Needing, not needing,
Pushing, and pulling back,
Until you snap, like a twig, or a piece of twine.

I want to believe in the future, I want to think that I will be safe.
But my heart, with its jagged edges, thinks otherwise.
This last time, I believed I needed him so necessarily.
That I would stop breathing or my heart would stop beating if I did not have him,
If I did not join us together,
Hands clasped, but quiet
In the same room.

All my jagged heart wanted was to chew someone up and abandon them like they did not matter.
Once it had done that, it was satisfied.
So am I satisfied?

No.

So I journeyed,
I went far,
Under a guise of another mission,
But my true intent was just to see,
Like a scout,
What would my jagged edged heart do?

And it did as you might expect.
It swallowed someone up whole,
Made them care,
Made them love,
Made them say they would do so much, be so much, change as I wanted them to be,
And then I spat them out.

What is wrong with you, you jagged heart?

All my jagged heart wanted was to chew someone up and abandon them like they did not matter.
Once it had done that, it was satisfied.
So am I satisfied?

No.

For a while, I felt little.
I cried sporadically, as much as these jagged edges would allow.
But it always ended quickly. It never lasted.

It would cycle. I’d be lonely,
Have a quiet moment,
Be by myself,
At night time
In an empty bed
Or an empty room
Nothing to occupy my thoughts
So I would seek him out again, saying I needed him
Missed him.
The cycle continuing.

It was not, is not,
Enough to just say, “We are through here”, oh no.
This jagged edge heart holds on, and slices through both him and him.
We’re still locked together, though we are apart.
The cycle continuing.
Every quiet moment.

All my jagged heart wanted was to chew someone up and abandon them like they did not matter.
Once it had done that, it was satisfied.
So am I satisfied?

No.

I try to push those thoughts,
The nearly uncontrollable want to text him, call him, see him, talk to him
When I am sad or angry or alone or fed up with my life,
But I need to learn that we are not to be. We never were.

All my jagged heart wanted was to chew someone up and abandon them like they did not matter.
Once it had done that, it was satisfied.
So am I satisfied?

No.

Love is dormant, but it is there. It is quiet, but I believe it to be true, and worth something.
Maybe it is no different than the other times that this has happened –
No different than when my jagged edges heart split someone else (and myself) in two,
But maybe it is.

And if it is, I hope I can figure that out soon.
Before it is too late.
Because then the other side, the smooth side, the less jagged side,
It aches.
It wonders how long it will take, before this one leaves too.

Leave me, like I know you want to.

If pushed away, left before leaving,
As I said before, one will start to believe it.
I can have with this one leaving. I can let it happen. Let him move on.
But do I want to let that happen? No.

All my jagged heart wanted was to chew someone up and abandon them like they did not matter.
Once it had done that, it was satisfied.
So am I satisfied?

No.

I made you care,
I made you love me. I should be able to deal with it.
But I can not.

My jagged heart will not let me. It is never happy, never content, never satisfied.
Why can’t I be satisfied?

All my jagged heart wanted was to chew someone up and abandon them like they did not matter.
Once it had done that, it was satisfied.
So am I satisfied?

No.

My jagged edges, and it never changes.

Once it had done that, it was satisfied.

I made you love me. I should be able to deal with it.
But I can not.
Am I satisfied?

No.

[Omac]

It’s jagged, ruby eyes stared back at me as it ran towards me. It’s big metal flippers clanging against its sides. I had to think fast if I wasn’t going to be slaughtered, but I wasn’t fast enough. He tackled me to the ground, cutting through my pocket to get my starfish gem before sliding it across the floor to the other side of the room, doing the same with my whistle. Due to being on my back I couldn’t reach my sword. I was surly screwed.
“I’m glad that you could make it,” he screeched, his words being muffled through the metal, “You’ll be my first victim of the week. I have been itching to get a kill in. Folks don’t come around here very often,” he aimed his flipper close to my throat, “How does it feel knowing you went through all this for nothing?”
“H-how did you know about my gem and Butterball?”
“I’ve been watching you, waiting for you to arrive. You were going to use magic to harm me and that’s cheating,” he pulled away before standing up, “Draw your sword, we’re going to fight for real. Like, men,”
I nodded pulling out my blade. I needed to get my starfish stone back if I had any hope of defeating him. I was certainly not a swordsmen. I wouldn’t even know how to hit a tree with a stick. I have seriously bad aim. I remember playing basketball with my friend back at his house which felt like a lifetime ago. I had made a single shot out of sheer luck. That was one thing I could say about myself, I was very, very lucky.
“So uh.. Sword, think we got this?”
The sword replied, “Just try not to bleed on me…”
“How reassuring of you,” I said sarcastically.
I didn’t have time to mess around, I needed to buy myself some time so I could get to my missing belongings. I held my sword the best I could and ran forward. I dove the blade into the penguin's chest, but it simply stopped me dead in my tracks without causing any damage. Fudge moved his flipper fast, so fast I couldn’t comprehend what happened, but somehow I ended up halfway across the room. I was flashing red and felt a pain in my belly, but it faded away.
“Silly child, you’re not ready for this. You don’t a clue of what you’re doing,” Fudge said as he slowly made his way over to me.
I had an idea, but it was crazy. I ran and slid underneath of the metal penguin suit. He laughed and held his left flipper up high ready to strike. That’s when I did something completely random and dove my sword into the crease in between his flipper and his side and sliced off his flipper. Out of anger he attempted to stab with me his other flipper, but I did the same and made him armless.
I felt like I had one as I picked myself back walking over to my starfish gem. I would use my gem in white mode and break apart his armor to get to Fudge inside. At least that’s what I thought. It was that moment where I looked over to see a red beam coming from his jagged eyes. It hit me sending me out the window, falling towards my death. I quickly pressed the button my helmet and flew back inside. I had lived! I then saw that my sword was no longer in my hands and must have fallen when I was outside. Uh, oh.
I ran for my gem, but a second laser beam shot me into the wall. He started to get closer to me and I didn’t know what I could do. I pulled out my boomerang and leap forward as he grew near. I started to climb onto him until I reached the top where I took my boomerang and bashed in his glass eyes. He stepped back and did a complete u turn and switched sides with where I previously was. I tried to push him out the window, but he was too big.
I then remembered that JJ said my sword would always return to me. “Sword!” I called out to it. It came up through the window, threw the metal penguin suit and back into my arms. I then thrust the sword through the bird’s beak. When I pulled it back out the suit started to spark up and then fell backwards and out the window. I had won. Right away I retrieved my whistle and gem before turning my attention to a glowing treasure chest in the middle of the room.
I slowly grew closer to it afraid that it could be some sort of trick. When I close enough I noticed it was unlocked so I slid it open to be blinded by a bright light. When my eyes adjusted I could see multiple items that could be useful. I should take everything that I can with me. The first thing I noticed was a thick back pack with six sections dived through it, each zipped up to keep whatever could be locked inside safe. This would be very useful to carry more items on me. Almost like it was left here for that exact reason.
I then came across a small bird cage. I wasn’t sure if it would be of any use, but I stuffed it into the biggest compartment in the backpack. The next thing I saw among the hundreds of gold coins were three very special looking ones. One was green with a leaf on it, one was red with a fire symbol with it, and was on blue with a raindrop figure on it. I stuffed those into the small front section of the backpack. I then came across a series of parts that looked like it could be built into something useful, so I stuffed it away too.
I dug through the gold coins, taking some of those too, until I came upon a yellow rubber ducky. I wasn’t sure how that would be of any use, but I put it away anyway. The only other thing I saw that might have been useful was a notebook full of information. I didn’t have time to read right now, but I could like I’ve seen it before. I closed the chest and moved my attention to finding the crystal that I came here for. And, then suddenly it started to float from above down to me and into my hands.
The next thing I knew I was back outside the tower back staring at JJ with the backpack on my back and the blue colored crystal in my hands. I had won and nothing had gone terribly wrong. I stepped towards JJ, but felt a strong pain burn up my arm and throughout my body. I fell to my knees. I looked to the crystal that was now glowing red and I could feel the intense feeling of anger. My hoodie began to glow a dark black color. Something was terribly wrong. I stood up drawing my sword, but could feel my eyes slowly dropping until I fell into a deep sleep. I couldn’t see anything, but I could the next thing I did and said.
Swoosh!
JJ screamed out as the clash of metal rang through my ears. He started to beg for forgiveness, but I couldn’t fight back the urge. “W-who are you?” He asked trying to uncover what was truly going on.
The next thing I said chilled me to the bone and I didn’t have any control. After I said it I heard the thrust of a sword and JJ’s yelling continued for many minutes after. Then it was over. A completely silence. I could keep hearing those words over and over in my head like I was being taunted with me. “I’m the.. Pied Piper!”

End of Chapter 1