Space Orcs and Other Such Beings [M] (IC)

[Yggdrasil_Hugger]

"Welcome aboard the 'xkjdhduushduh suhfuhauhdufhuggy yu' or in English, the 'Rooty Tooty Lightspeed Shooty'. Aboard the Rooty Tooty Lightspeed Shooty, your mission is to explore the universe! You and your crewmates will map the unknown universe, bringing it and any intelligent life to the knowledge of the Universal Confederacy! But, you knew all that when you signed onto this ship. I am Malron, and I will be your Captain." the Gordathi smiled. Or rather, their best approximation of a smile. It was more turning light purple than a mouth movement. Behind him, Prog Volvov and Similav stood doing their best approximations of smiling. Descan stood behind him too, with a weak smile and a weak wave.

[Enigma]

"Apprentice B," Chief Rosenberg nodded, waving towards a chair in front of his sDesk. "May I ask why you volunteered for this assignment?"
"It was available," Kira said, glancing at the chair doubtfully, then back at him. He frowned.

"Apprentice," Commander Taylor said, leaning forward from the other chair. "You've been invited to sit."
"Yes sir," Kira replied, glancing at both men warily, then stepped over and perched herself on the front edge of the cushion. The two men exchanged a look, then stared back at her.

"Did nothing else appeal to you?" the Chief asked.
"Sir, I graduated from the Academy two months ago. I submitted requests for assignment at a dozen locations and," she paused, firming her jaw, "I heard nothing. After that, I began applying for everything."
"Do you feel that your lack of assignment was concerning your status as a cryogen?"

Somehow, her rigid pose on the edge of her seat became stiffer.

"No sir," she lied.

"Good," the chief smiled, glancing over at Commander Taylor, who also smiled. "The truth is, we've been eyeing you for this assignment for some time."
"I'm just an apprentice, sir."
"An impressive one. During training, some of your instructors felt you were holding back, especially in hand-to-hand combat. So they arranged a test."
"The attack from behind, sir?" Kira asked, eyes narrowing. Obviously they expected her to accept that. "How is Drill Instructor Duggins, sir?"

"Drill Instructor Duggins is recovering nicely from his broken arm," Taylor said, leaning forward to rest his hands on his knees as he stared back at Kira, his own jaw jutting out slightly.
"Yes, remarkable restraint in such a surprise training exercise," the Chief beamed. "You were clearly holding back so as to not embarrass the rest of your class."

Kira watched the two men silently. Rosenberg glanced at Taylor, then cleared his throat.

"So, we're sending you out as part of the Security detail for the 'xkj...', er, 'xkjdh...'"
"The 'Rooty Tooty Lightspeed Shooty,'" Taylor interrupted. There wasn't a trace of amusement in his flat voice.
"Is that really what the name translates to?"
"According to its captain, sir."
"Sounds like something you'd order for breakfast," the Chief frowned. "Anyway, it's important that we have someone who can show a great deal of restraint on board to represent the service, as this is a Universal Confederacy ship. Spots like this don't open every day, I can assure you."

"Yes sir," Kira replied when the chief glanced at her, as he seemed to want a response.

"To show our support, we've sent out two Centurions with those lift packs and those oversized carbines, as well as two pallets of ammo. We're also supplying one arms locker, with carbines, shotguns, handguns, stun grenades and ammo, just in case."
"Two... Centurions, sir?" Kira interrupted, leaning forward microscopically. Did someone else volunteer? "Will there be someone else?"

"A volunteer in their cryo facility, should something happen," Taylor smirked, leaning back. "Doubtful you'll ever meet."
"Yes," the Chief glanced at Taylor irritably. "Ahem. We're also putting on some basic supplies. Med packs, TravelRation packs, that sort of thing."
"Sir, you're forgetting...."
"Taylor? Oh, yes. That."

"That, sir?" Kira asked, opening frowning as she glanced between the two men. Taylor was struggling to keep a straight face, while Rosenberg looked uncomfortable.
"Well," the Chief drawled, pulling a bag out from behind his desk and handing it to her. "It's the name, you see. We..."
"It's a test," Taylor said, not hiding the predatory gleam in his eye. "We think they picked the name deliberately to put our people at ease. So we want them to put them at ease. When you go on board, we'd like you to wear that, to throw them off guard."

Kira glanced in the bag and a rare bloom of pinkness blushed her cheeks.

"Is... Is this an order, sir?"

Rosenberg glanced irritated at Taylor who was now openly smiling, then sighed, leaning back. "It is. Get your orders from the clerk, grab your gear and report on board within the hour, Apprentice B."



"Welcome aboard the 'xkjdhduushduh suhfuhauhdufhuggy yu'," the Gordathi smiled.

Kira stood there, in her basic black fatiques, wearing the cheap pink plastic deely bobbers on her head, with only a trace of pink on her cheeks as she stared back expressionless as her new alien captain went on to explain their mission in front of his alien crew and her human companions.

She should have trashed them the moment she left the office.

[AngelDellaNotte]

Vanessa ran through the station with her duffle bag slung over her shoulder, the bag was almost as tall as her and nearly weighed as much as her too. “I am so late and so lost.”Vanessa thought pausing at a screen flashing the docking locations of the many ships in port. She had over slept being a bit jet lagged. She seemed to always be jet lagged. Growing up on Neptune she was used to a sixteen hour day, then at Cambridge she had to get used to a twenty-four hour day. Odenlone 6 was weird and had a thirty hour day. She honestly had no idea what kind of day this station ran on and was probably the reason she had over slept. She just hoped the Rooty Tooy Lightspeed Shooty was somewhere in the middle.

The screen was written in well over a dozen languages unfortunately none of them were languages she could read. Humans were new to the Confederacy and they hadn't really made many additions for them. She watched as “xkjdhduushduh suhfuhauhdufhuggy yu” popped up on the screen. She noticed it showed in Raspton though she was far better at speaking it than reading it and wasn't sure if it said deck seventeen or deck seventy-one. The two decks were nowhere near each if she guessed wrong she was going to miss the ship and damn she needed this job. Frantically looking around she noticed a Ifan sitting at an information desk. Vanessa ran over to him huffing from all the running and the stress of being late. The Ifan were a bipedal species that to humans honestly looked like giant sloths. “W-what deck is the xkjdhussh....” She said, her nerves affecting her stutter and not allowing her to say the ship name. “The Roo... rooty...Tooty... Light...light....light...speed....Shoo... shit-balls!” She cursed unable to spit out the name of the ship though it didn't matter because it seemed the Ifan wasn't understanding her. Noticing the Ifan sitting in front of her she subconsciously switched to Ifani as she kept swearing, “Mother fucking fuckety fuck trumpet! Just spit the damn thing out Van!”

The Ifan sat up looking rather upset at her causing Vanessa to realize she had made the switch and that he understood her. The Ifan were broken up into multiple sects and it seemed this Ifan was a member of the Uron a very pious group. Vanessa was really screwed if she didn't fix this soon. The Ifan already looked to be reaching to call security. “Hey, sorry I didn't mean you. I'm having a very bad day. Please forgive me.” Vanessa said, bowing her head and crossing her hands over her eyes so her left hand was over her right eye and right hand over her left eye. It was a gesture of sincere apology among the Ifan.

There was a pause then the Ifan nodded, “How may I help you?”The Ifan said, seemed to have completely forgotten the offense.

“The Rooty Tooty Light Speed Shooty, what deck is it docked on?” Vanessa said, realizing that in Ifani it mean the Enlighten Ray of Star Light. It seemed the ship name meant something different in each language though it was only stupid in the human language. She was really starting to wonder if the Confederacy was screwing with the humans sort of like a pranking a new pledge at a fraternity.

“Deck seventy-one.” The Ifan said.

Vanessa nodded and barely had enough time to thank the Ifan before she was racing to the elevator. She barely managed to slide in as the doors closed. The ride up seemed to take forever but in just a few minutes she was there. Vanessa ran down the corridor not stopping until she reach a couple of station guards who she flashed her orders to before they stepped aside. She dropped her bag in the cargo bay and ran over to all the new crew members who were standing as the captain was talking to them. She barely came to a stop but not quite fast enough bumping into a soldier wearing a pink goofy thing on her head. “They a-a-aren't making us...wear... wear.. those are th...th..they?” Vanessa quietly asked, not recognizing the pink thing from any of her lessons.

[Enigma]

“They a-a-aren't making us...wear... wear.. those are th...th..they?” the strange woman who'd just bumped into her asked, staring up at the deely bobbers Kira had on her head. She almost couldn't believe it - an adult woman who was shorter than her!

"My boss was afraid the aliens wouldn't notice me without them," Kira lied softly, blinking her large eyes at Vanessa. "Saves me from wearing out the toes of my boots. I'm sorry, I don't have any spares, you'll need to get your own."

[Lumi]

"You'll be sure to call me everyday right?"

"Oui."

"A-and you'll do your exercises?"

"Oui."

"Don't forget to-"

"Lucien, don't worry I won't forget anything. We made a list remember?" Ila couldn't help but smile to herself at her son's worrying, he always seemed to go over the top with it 'Must have got that from papa'. "If you don't stop worrying so much you'll give yourself a heart attack and you're much too young for that."

"Je suis desole maman, I-I'm just going to miss you." Her smile fell at the sound of his voice- he was on the verge of tears and it broke her heart to hear it and not be able to comfort him. "I'm going to miss you too tetard, but I need you to be brave for me and watch over mamie and papy. Can you do that?"

"yes..."

"I love you Lucien."

"I-I love you too maman!"

After saying the rest of her goodbyes to her parents and Lucien she hung up- unballing her fist and removing her AR glasses and putting them away. She sighed before looking up at the terminal boards, her eyes scanning each ship name and departure time. In all honesty she could barely make out what any of the words said, she considered herself lucky she had decided to memorize the exact alien spelling. Picking up her backpack and grabbing a hold of her suitcase handle Ila began making her way to deck seventy-one. Upon arriving she checked her bag into cargo and over towards what she assumed to be her new crew members. It seemed she had made it just when the captain had finished delivering his speech and had only caught the shift in the emotion, which she guessed was his version of a smile.

"Ah, so sorry I am late. Please tell me I did not miss anything important."

[Dire Hoef]

"Do you remember your mission?"

"Yes. Record and analyse all additional information acquired through social interaction between extraterrestrial beings. We have been told this numerous times."

"Good. I have only need to remind you why the Institute has tasked you with this mission. Do not fail us."

"We would not think of such a thing, we remain loyal to the Institute and its core mission. This will be carried to the best of our ability."

"Dismissed."

The Ordinance walked (but more like strode) through the station, seemingly occupying the space between various beings without even disturbing their concentration. The Ordinance, almost being viewed as a nonperson, gazed around the various sights of the station taking in all the different walks of life the universe had birthed and the various onslaught of languages and cultures it was no more familiar with than the average human.

"Most intriguing.."

"Have we discovered where the ship is?"

"Unfortunately not. Our language banks have not properly adjusted to the Confederacy's language database. It will require more time to fully integrate them, but in the meantime we can infer that the way to the ship is here."

It slipped through a packed crowd and into a docking area where the ship detailed with indescribable letters was being held. There in the cargo-hold, was its supposed captain giving a blanketed speech about something expeditious.

"That is our captain."

"Thank you for the obvious observation. We already know this."

"Well it is not like we know much else."

"That is a negative statement. We know where we must be, and what we must do to perform the coming interactions with these biologicals."

"When do we get to ingest their delicious ship food???"

"Soon. We must present ourselves in either case."

Displaying itself before the congregation as, at least, a presence just as the speech neared completion, it looked around at those present guessing where to insert itself into a conversation.

[dakkagor]

The bar of a week ago seemed very far away.

It had been a celebration, a sending off. He was being reassigned, and a few others were mustering out to go home. The bar, part of the military base built into the nearly zero-kelvin temperature of Bacchus, a drunken far-orbiting ice rock far out in the reaches of Sol system, had resounded to the sounds of Barrett's Privateers, one of the favourite drinking songs of the international marine corp that helped keep the space lanes of sol system safe. It had been a good night with the result of a blistering headache that even his augmented body couldn't shift, followed by a week of ship-to-ship transfers out to the station and his rendezvous with the Universal Confederacy ship called. . .uggghh. . . he couldn't even bring himself to think its name.

However, he had a nice souvenir. Isla had bought him a translation and personal assistant VI and had it installed in his suit as a going away present. He had joked he'd barely need it, but on the bewildering station it was saving his life.

Left here, then take the stairwell up two levels.

He smiled and nodded as he took the corner at a run, the armours muscles bunching and expanding around him as he sprinted through the deck. Wearing it was the easiest way to move it around the station, even though all the weapon systems had been disabled by station security. Isla had recorded enough voice samples so that the VI sounded like her, right down to the accent. It was a thoughtful gift, even though it sounded sometimes like his old corporal was nagging him and giving him orders now. As he pounded up the stairs, Ilsa's voice continued to brief him on the ship and its crew. It sounded like a damn small boat, not like the Confederacies (rumoured) dreadnoughts, smaller even than the next-gen cruisers being produced by humanity around Mars. He'd served on corvettes and destroyers before, and he reckoned the . . .sigh. . .Rooty Tooty would be like those. So tight spaces and not much room to stretch your legs.

Finally he saw the airlock on deck seventy one. He boarded and saw the Captain (Slug. Thing.), four fellow humans, and one of those transhumanists from the martian colony he had heard about. He dropped his kit bag to the floor with a resounding thump, and came to attention with sharp salute.

"Sergeant Paramore reporting for duty Sah!"

He stole a quick glance at his fellow humans, then returned his eyes to the captain. His helmet didn't betray the motion.

"Permission to come aboard?"

[Enigma]

Incredible. The captain started talking to her and everyone else showed up.

Glancing at all the tall people, especially the one saluting, she leaned over to Vanessa and joked softly, "Let's hope they don't leave right away. I think we need to hit the concourse and get ourselves a few pairs of steel toe boots. Pointy ones."

[Yggdrasil_Hugger]

Captain Malron jumped a bit, then turned a darker shade of purple. "Yes, yes. Permission granted. You will, of course, have to remove the armor when inside. Not a lot of room for that much metal, I assure you. Permission to come aboard, all of you! Welcome!" they gilded off the to side, gesturing into the ship with a couple of tentacles. "I will introduce you to the rest of your crew on board."

Descan also scooted off to the side. He was still smiling, but he was eyeing the armored man very closely. Was it fear? Curiosity? Attraction? It was hard to tell, but he was twitching slightly closer every few seconds.

Similav couldn't care less about the bipeds joining their crew. They just wanted to make sure the humans wouldn't mess up their ship. It wasn't easy to keep the ship in top condition, and having a bunch of uprights with too many extremities everywhere just might ruin everything.

Prog Volvov was sort of smiling. Her beak wasn't really made for smiling, but she had read that smiling helped put humans at ease. So she was smiling to the best of her ability. She also waved, and her claws made slight clicking sounds whenever they connected. She had read that waving was another thing humans did that put them at ease.

[AngelDellaNotte]

“N..n..n..no than-ank you.” Van said, still looking at the pink hat thing. The woman wasn't much taller than her. That was unusual, she was use to people being taller than her. Though most were quite a bit taller than her. Being a naturalist her parents hadn't done any gene-tweaking when she had been in womb with the exception of weeding out any unwanted health conditions. This day and age you could custom design your child. If you wanted a boy with curly blonde hair, blue eyes and standing over six feet that was no problem. Not her family, they wanted what nature gave them. Of her four siblings Van had been the shortest even though she was a middle child.

There seemed to be a lot of military people on the ship and more people were coming aboard at the same time as her than she expected. The two males that approached unnerved her, least she thought they were male, it was hard to tell with the mods and armor. Van had never seen so many mods on someone. The city she had grown up in had a lot of naturalist but it wasn't totally filled only with them. Most people who had them only had a few and they were usually minor. The heavier moded of the two down right scared her. Without thinking she took a step toward the woman with the pink hat, who made a comment about getting some pointy boots.

Van had never thought of joining the military. She was more of a student and even then she didn't meet the physical standards to join. “Hell...hell...hell...o.” Van said, her eyes not able to leave the Ordinance even though she knew it was rude to stare.