HOUSEMASTER'S HOROSCOPES
~Putting your future as risk since 1893~
Aries
March 21 - April 19
OH BARF, Your life is just a complete and utter mess! Mars, Venus, and the bloody Sun has readily decided to faff around Aries in an enduring cluster of disaster. They're making a mess of your horoscope and they know it. Mercury was over earlier, but the others made fun of him so much that he left. Those bastards! Anything baring the colour red should be readily avoided, plus I would stay clear of electrical equipment if I were you and bunker down with some candles and canned food. Your lucky number is 13.
Taurus
April 20 - May 20
You're recovering from what looks like eight broken bones. Don't worry! The stars have indicated that you will be blessed with a one-time payout of random generosity. This is what happens when Jupiter wanders around your zodiac, he brings snacks and drives you to the doctor's office when you choke on a chicken wing. Good guy Jupiter isn't here for long though so be sure to exploit your friends and family for as long as possible while the getting is good! Patterns containing polkadots will contain future treasure. Your lucky number is 4.
Gemini
May 21 - June 20
Investment banking! If you haven't already started piling your life-savings into bank investments, now is the time! If you have been reading this issue for 10+ years when I told you to invest in residential property back in 2005, clearing your mind and forgiving past wrongs will lead you to spiritual fulfilment. Green is your lucky colour for all the big ol' bucks you're gonna be rolling in once you throw all your money towards your banks. Avoid anyone with an economy degree, for they will attempt to lead you astray. Your lucky number is enormous... because of how much money you'll make.
Cancer
June 21 - July 22
Everything is going to appear incredibly normal for awhile, but don't let down your guard. Something out there is trying to get you, something sinister and destructive. It could be anything in your house. Your phone, your lamp, your bookshelf, either one of these things could be plotting to
kill you. The only solution is to find a way into Space where there's nothing. Use any means necessary and do it quickly, for whatever has it out for you will certainly strike soon and quickly! Avoid reading signs and flee from anything that resembles authority. Your lucky number 0, because all the other numbers could be conspiring against you.
Leo
July 23 - August 22
Dude, check out how spazzed out Cancer is! Yeah, Cancer totally thinks that there's something out to get them. For maximum cosmic fulfilment, sneak into Cancer's house during the night and move around their furniture ever so slightly. Changing their lightbulbs to a lower watt capacity to dim the room will also work. Your life is now currently devoted to driving Cancer insane, and you will find riches if you document your exploits on film and sell it to NBC as a new prime-time show. Be sure to donate some of your royalties to Housemaster. Your lucky number is 3812, as in it's the combination to get into Cancer's house.
Virgo
August 23 - September 22
The stars are telling you to try new things. Now is the time to get messy and jump into the mudpile called 'life'. The world is your oyster, so you better chuck it before it gets rotten and some jerk of a seagull steals it right off your plate. Gravitate closer to trains and buses and just sell your house, wander the world and grow a beard. Saturn will soon be visiting, and when Saturn arrives you will be expected to tell some fantastic stories. If you have none, Saturn will shank yo' ass... seriously, I've seen it done, it's scary. Your lucky number is ⅖.
Libra
September 23 - October 22
Saturn just left your house, hopefully you had some good stories to tell otherwise you're probably in the hospital right now. If you've heeded my advice then I congratulate you and your long and prosperous life ahead of you. If you're currently reading this from the confines of your hospital beds, fumbling through the jungle of IV cords in hopes of finding the 'Call Nurse' button that fell underneath your urine bucket, then I'm just gonna say 'I told you so'. Avoid wearing the colour green, because it isn't Saint Patrick's day. Your lucky number is 54.
Scorpio
October 23 - November 21
Today is the day! It's time to pucker those cheeks, suck in that gut, and punch your shyness. Today you're going to ask that special someone out on a date. Start by flirting with your crush in a Spongebob cartoon voice, you know, to set the mood. If they're not biting, consider taking them out to see a movie. If they decline, have your trusty friend 'Mr. Chloroform Cloth' to help you out! They will be impressed with your initiative, and should be willing to sex your face until everything gets chaffed. Your lucky number is 69, go get em' you ol' dog!
Sagittarius
November 22 - December 21
Watch out for lesser creatures trying to profit from your social stature. Pluto is moping abysmally in your zodiac, yearning for the days it used to be a planet. But it's not a planet, and you should be sure to tell everyone who thinks they're good at something that they're not. Find small children and tell them the harsh but refreshing truth that Santa is not real. Their tears is simply the cleansing effect of their cosmic spirit. Wrestling is fake! The Q-Bracelet is fake! Astrology is...
*cough* er... carry on. Your lucky number is 99.
Capricorn
December 22 - January 19
YOU SHOULD CONSIDER RAISING YOUR VOICE MORE OFTEN! YOU WILL FIND THAT YOUR OPINION BECOMES MORE VALID WHEN REPEATED WITH VOLUME AND CONFIDENCE! BECOME A POLITICAL ANALYST AND ROOT FOR WHICHEVER SIDE GIVES YOU THE MOST MONEY. SPEND ANY EARNED MONEY ON MEGAPHONES AND SPEAKERS! EDUCATION IS FOR DOLTS AND HIPPIES, PROVE YOUR WORTH WITH POWER AND OBNOXIOUS ARGUMENTS! YOUR LUCKY NUMBER IS OVER NINE THOUSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAND!!!!!
Aquarius
January 20 - February 18
With Neptune hovering around your zodiac you will feel the urge to become a full-time chef. You need to approach this carefully, for cooking food is a dangerous and hazardous job. Start by emptying the grocery story of all of its bacon, vinegar, cement, and oreo cookies; you don't need these items, it just works in your favour for no one else to have them. Get hired as a chef and make whatever your heart's content. You may be put down for not 'making what the costumer ordered' or 'thinking pencil sharpening is a proper garnish'. They're simply not as enlightened to the cosmos as you are. Your lucky number is 15, as in you'll need 15 tablespoons of motor oil to spruce that spagetti sauce up!
Pisces
February 19 - March 20
Mercury is trying to warn you about the impending cluster of trouble that's currently happening with Aries. While you should be concerned, Uranus provides far more interesting 'today' news. Uranus is sick of everyone giggling at its name, and has thusly reminded you he is Zeus' Grandfather. If you were listening to Uranus, he will grant you with untold power only bestowed to the superheros or plot-convenient villains. You now have the power to win every thumbwar you declare! Go forth and dominate the world with your new talents. No one can stop you now... Your lucky number is 1, as in you're #1 in thumbwars.
The Tribune Wordsearch - Members of RPA!
Word List:
Aesa
Alpha
Anastasia
Anne Bonny
Auki
Bee Bear
Bia
Blue Moon
Casuna
Ceres
Cfavano
Craze
Delicross
Delta
DoughGuy
DragonEmperorUK
Evil Troy |
Falcon
Fortune
Froggy
Gabriel Zero
GirlyWoman
Goldenmyth
Hayabusa
Housemaster
Imposter
Jarms
Jeremor
Kiall
Koti
Kris
LittleLionFire
LoveAmore |
MerryGentry
Mindless Invalid
Miss Devil
Mr Boxer
Mysteria
Nazgul
Omac
Porcelien Doll
Sentana Bentara
SmileyCassandra
SneakyonFoota
SQJPure
TheDoctor
TheTeeJaii
TwistedMyth
VampiressAngel |
From The Mouth of The Members.
This week, I asked you about your favourite part of RPApril! ( Aside from my birthday, of course. ) I also found out where some of you draw your inspiration.

trouble.muffin |
chilloice
|

Ru |

SQJPure |

Bee Bear |

Leon G |
My favourite part of RPApril is seeing all of the different contests our lovely staff create for us; whether I enter them or not, I read them all. |
My favorite part of RPApril would have to be Writers Marathon and the Triple Threat Contest. They were fun with all the different topics to talk about. The Triple Threat was slightly harder because it takes a while to be able to come up with an entwined story but that's how I can grow but those two are my favorite part of RPApril and I can't wait to see them again next year. |
Well, I really loved feeling challenged! Especially because I gave myself my own theme while participating in Triple Threat. I told myself every single entry was going to be really sad and heart wrenching no matter the topics. The last one was a toughy with that, ha ha. |
The writers marathon, it is easy the most difficult part of RPApril, most especially if you have other things happening in your life... ..Especially when you're posting comedy which is easily the hardest genre there is (It's easy to make someone feel your pain, it's not so easy (to) drag someone into your sense of humour.) Also what makes it even better is it's a race you do alone despite the fact that you're with other people. Which makes it a real test of yourself, especially if you get repped for your comedy. |
My favourite part of RPApril was that I could participate and compete with my friends. We got so competitive, each wanting to outdo the other, yet in the end we really just had fun. We helped each other, inspired each other, and just had fun together. That's what still sticks by me today now that everything's finished. |
Favorite part of RPApril? That's easy- the writer's marathon. With new challenges everyday that ranged from Shakespeare to pineapple pizza it really kept me on my toes! |
For inspiration, I consult my own favorite artists of any media, especially music. I also get a great bit of inspiration from my favorite authors and directors. |
I get inspired by reading my stories when I want to add more to it or if I need to post. When nothing gets me going I go to music because it brings ideas to mind depending on the genre. When music doesn't work I go outside and head to the park and play with the dogs, a nice game of fetch or tug-o-war helps get my creative juices flowing. If everything fails, I just sleep on it and it sounds weird but I dream of what I write and when I wake up I'm writing it up on paper so I don't forget. |
Inspiration? Gosh, good question. I just let it come to me, really. With those stories I didn't really look to anything for inspiration or ideas. Most of my work just pops up in my head. |
Walk. Easiest thing to do to break writer's block. That and carry paper with me... I also keep track of bursts of inspiration, which is where the pen and paper come in handy. NO MATTER WHERE THEY HAPPEN. The best plot breakthroughs i've come up with have come from showering or a toilet seat (not both at the same time, there isn't a toilet seat in my shower!) Also since I take note of well EVERY 'bright' idea. I generally keep track of them and even if I don't create a book or a writing piece out of one of the ideas I can use them to break writers block. |
There are a few tricks I have. Sometimes music is all I need to get me in the mood, and other times I just talk out loud about what it is I'm trying to write, and bam, inspiration strikes. Really, just having someone to listen to you ramble is amazingly helpful when it comes to getting your thoughts in or |

Common Sense with Candice
Since it has been awhile since the Tribune has been posted, I figured, "Instead of asking questions, how about I explain something that I'm curious about?"
The Topic is Diversity in Roleplaying
Everyone should be well aware by now, that Roleplay Adventures is home to one of the largest, most diverse roleplaying sites on the Internet. You may never find a place online where such an unusual grouping of people, come together to weave stories with one another. Every story, every person, every character - is different in their own, unique way. While there may be some similarities, there is always something different about everything you read.
Do you know what that is?
It's the person behind the words, behind the screen; typing at a keyboard, tapping across a virtual keyboard on their smartphones. No matter how they access RPA, one thing is quite common: their love for writing. I've never met a person on RPA that didn't join for their love of writing, whether script writing, lyric writing, story writing or some completely different type of writing style that I'm not aware of. We just don't have writers here, either. We have game designers, therapists, teachers, musicians, dancers, military veterans that take part in many, many different kinds of creative expression. Paintings, drawings, graphic design, sculpting - you name it, we probably have someone on RPA that has a unique talent just waiting to burst forth onto the screen.
It's an innate desire for humans to be able to express themselves. You see it everyday; in body piercings, hair color, clothing, the way a person walks and talks. There is never an absence of diversity and uniqueness anywhere in the world. You may not see it, but the person writing with you, may have a desire to be an astronaut. You may have never noticed that that very same person may have come from a very rough home life, or has a learning disability. You never truly know who a person is on the other side of the screen, do you?
Could you honestly say, you know everything about, say, your best friend from Roleplay Adventures, unless you took the time, the compassion and the consideration to know them as a person? I've gotten to know many people here over my years. Everyone of them different in their own ways. I know someone with Dyslexia, others with Aspergers, even some people with PTSD or Bipolar Mania. I never would've thought they had such issues like that, but I never let it interfere with our friendship.
It's obvious by now, that there are people from different countries roleplaying here. Language barriers are a leading cause with some players doubting another's writing ability. Whose to say English is their first language? Or that they may have Dyslexia, which is why grammar in their posts are choppy at times? We weren't born literary geniuses. Hell, I bet Mark Twain never knew he would amount to anything when he was a child. One thing remains the same - we all began to learn, to improve in one way or another. Skill levels in terms of writing can differ greatly here on our humble roleplaying site. One person could write a novella per post, while another person is lucky to write a few sentences. Everyone has to begin somewhere, right?
Then why, if I am be so bold, have I seen people (not just online, but in my daily life), forgetting that everyone is different? That not everyone is capable of the same things? As a Game Master, picking and choosing players for your roleplay is one of the main bases for your whole idea, isn't it? To know a member's character, to know their writing style, their writing abilities. I still remember my humble beginnings in the field of writing; ghastly run-on sentences with several spelling and punctuation issues. Given that I began writing over a decade ago, it shouldn't come as a surprise that I wasn't the next T. S. Elliot. I had a desire to write, and I always tried to find ways to improve my writings, to make my stories better, to evolve my characters past the boring, flat personalities, to characters full of spunk, sass and whatever else I wanted.
I wasn't the best of writers - for all I know, I could've been the worst, but what helped me (besides English teachers), were gifted and friendly people, willing to help me evolve as a writer. Sometimes, in the hustle and bustle of trying to promote and keep a roleplay going, it's easy for a GM to forget that even a person with limited writing skills, could become the next best writer - if they were given the chance. While it is more work, and other players may feel bogged down, allowing a person to learn through example can vastly improve their own writing. It's easier to say, "No, you aren't what I'm looking for," than saying, "You need some work; I'll be happy to help!" Think about that the next time an interested player wants to take part in your story, but lacks the know-how. Don't be afraid to help them out. No matter how much work you've put into a roleplay, even if it fails, it can always be restarted. You shouldn't be afraid of letting an less-experienced player join just because they "can't keep up" with everyone else.
No one is the same; and it's kind of rude to think everyone is capable of achieving the same standards. You can only expect something of someone, if they have the drive to learn and improve, so try lending someone a hand. You never know if the person you help now, could be the next New York Times Best Selling Author several years down the road.
Food for thought.
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