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Thread: The RPA Tribune! Issue #23: July/August 2016

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    Default The RPA Tribune! Issue #23: July/August 2016



    Breaking News!!



    Here's the story of Kris and Merry
    who were bringing up some very lovely mods
    all of them had colorful names, like their mothers.
    the youngest ones in Green.

    Here's the story of a girl named G
    Who was busy with some mods of her own.
    They were staff living all together
    yet they were all alone

    Till the one day when the women met this lady.
    And they knew that it was much more than a hunch,
    That this group must somehow form a family,
    That's the way we all became the RPA bunch.

    The RPA bunch, the RPA bunch.
    That's the way we became the RPA bunch.

    by Kris and Karma






    It's RPA's 9th Birthday!! And the staff have come up with some awesome ways to celebrate - check out our birthday Advertisement and Banner contests now!!!

    -
    Notch your arrows and draw your swords, people! Preparations for the 2016 Annual Rumble on RPA are well underway, and it's shaping up to be an earth-shattering event! To celebrate, the Tribune will be featuring some of the most epic battles of years past later in the issue, so stay tuned!

    There's also a brand new contest in Awards and Special Events; 'Go Ahead, Make My Production Logo!' There's still time to enter, so check it out!!



    From The RPA Annual Rumble 2015; Gold Match.
    by The Doctor and Mystress of Onions

    This is it, then.

    A dimming land of shattered civilization, fragile and brittle at a glance, greeted the Fallen's sunken eyes upon his reappearance. Ghosts of calamity lapped upon his cheeks, phantom winds of a metropolis now lost. The loneliness of such a landscape was haunting in visual and aural presentation, seizing sympathy by its heartstrings and wrenching with great might. Romanticism, however, sprouted from every crack and crevice in the Fallen's perspective, for it was a rare and indescribable sight to watch the rotting corpse of a broken society. This was his legacy; every foe he destroyed, every nemesis he conquered, obelisks of grand achievement met with an ultimate fate of evanescence by the implacable zephyr of time itself. The silent solitude of such a disclosure, polluted only by the ambient breezes from beyond, was both diluting and harrowing.

    But I'm not alone here, am I?

    Another female stood before him on the opposite side of the fractured street, not divergent in appearance from his previous opponent. However, while cursed with a similar deathly skin tone and pitch, navy-like locks, her eyes glimmered with a curious lavender tinge that sparkled with duplicitous life yet betrayed little enthusiasm. Her perfection paralleled the Fallen's own, her rounded cheeks expressing ardent femininity compared to his own angular jawline. Below her paradoxical gaze lay statuesque lips, flawlessly rotund and exquisitely crimson.

    Just like his mother's.

    His newfound memories tore jagged scars into the flesh of his mind, but he had little time to contemplate them beyond a glance. Beings of omnipotent proportion sprung from the ground and descended from the sky above, spouting bemusing diction that the Fallen gathered and digested to the best of his ability. So these were his gods, his masters in this incomprehensible tournament, and they demanded his entertainment once more. These were the beings of his innermost hatred, manifestations of his patience waned and starved by nonsensical folly. Every one of them stood before him in his new arena, together in his radical presence. Before the sun fell, he would bathe in their collective bloodshed.

    But...that's it.

    A chortle crept from the Fallen's figure as the angel Kris demanded conflict, a quiet snigger that quickly ascended to greater size. It grew out of his control, perverting into a maniacal cackle as he doubled over with arms clasped across his abdomen. "In...ingenious!" The laughter continued as he threw his face skyward, wild eyes gazing upon the amber clouds above. "Absolutely magnificent! What a beautiful, twisted plot! How could I possibly have ignored such an obvious solution?!"

    The towering man's roars of laughter settled to amused chuckles as he walked calmly towards the tokens of appeasement that clattered to the ground, his gnarled hand massaging his side through the black fabric of his coat. "This...this is all for me. You tested my patience with trial after trial, pulling away my prey moments before I pounced upon them. You whetted my curiosity by stealing my memories, but they were nothing but diversions to make me continue your game." He leaned over the small ovular spaceship and plucked it from the earth, raising it to eye level. "You made me keep playing as my desire to kill you grew beastly and near untamable. That is why I was punished for my assault upon you in the previous engagement: it simply wasn't the right time."

    As he dusted off the figurine, the Fallen walked towards the so-called "Baron of Blood," locking his gaze upon him. Without a doubt, this was the man who Sabriel had coaxed him into attacking, the god that had the authority to remove his indomitable powers. "This is a trial, an examination as to whether I truly deserve the kingdom which I so righteously overthrew. And in trying my claim, you want me to derive the highest form of absolute pleasure when I hurl your corpses upon the ground." His empty hand caressed his face as he approached the deity, the toy swaying by his side. "For I understand through these memories, I was driven by progress, yet never by indulgence. What sort of philistine ruler has the audacity to refuse the hedonism that his subjects so happily devour?"

    In tandem with his steps, the Enchanter prodded with the depths of his being, reaching for the pulsing signature of the pale lady. His mental presence caressed her power, yearning to reach out and seize it instantaneously. However, even he had his limits, for acquiring one of her coveted abilities demanded equal time and forbearance. As his steps echoed without disturbance between structures long abandoned, his mind reconstructed her supernatural ability within his entity, well on his way to confiscating that which was not his own. Whether she detected his duplication or not wouldn't matter when he was finished with her.

    The Fallen halted before the Baron and his hand fell to his side, a calmer demeanor assumed across his face. "Therefore, I shall kill this final sacrifice you have presented me with in a manner fitting for your entertainment, and I shall sip from the cup of self-gratification in the name of what belongs to me." He raised the synthetic model and extended it to the Baron, his grey eyes shining with passion and excitement. "Then, when I finish with her, I shall slaughter you all until said cup runneth over."

    Emonalach, the Fallen reborn, split his lips in serene rapture. "And I, a mortal, fragile being, shall rule an infinite empire in your names, my most loyal of subjects."

    -

    These battles she had been forced to fight, every one of them had been leading to this moment. This crucial moment where it would all end and she would be able to continue her quest for revenge. As the ground tremored with the rising gods, the natural rage that accompanied her existence sprang up as Vee realized that these people were the ones who tormented her. They were the ones who threw her in an arena and left her to die unless she could prove her worth.

    And what for? It was for a game. Everything she had done was for their precious game!

    Well then. It’s time to play it once more, isn’t it? Show them what you’re capable of.

    Ah yes. Her true power had awakened. The rushing power left behind in her world had unveiled itself, and she would finally be able to prove that she wasn’t someone to be messed with. She had her instinct. She had her abilities. And now, she had a worthy opponent standing before her.

    Indeed, as Vee faced this final foe, she could sense something in him that had been absent in those she had defeated previously. He was strong, intelligent, and dark. He carried the air of someone who had fought hard during his life, much like herself. Much like him. Oh, how the mere thought of him sent her spiraling. He was just like him. Confident. Sinister. Threatening. He was just like the one she spent her every waking moment hunting. And she hated it. A snarl snuck across her face as she recognized the semblance.

    Give them what they want.

    Should she oblige? Should she give them the show they desired?

    The answer was yes. She would give them exactly what they wanted, and after she finished her hunt for he who wrong her, she would be back for them. She would be back to destroy these gods, no matter how much time it took or how many tries it required. She would be the last one standing in the end. There was not a doubt in her mind.

    As Vee watched the dark male’s movements as he presented one of the four objects to the one god she recognized, a plan was formulating inside her mind. He was given the gift of time according to this god, but she was nearly certain it was temporary. It was a bet she would have to take.

    Let’s start.

    Each side had their pieces. Every move they would make would be like a chess board piece aimed strategically to force their opponent into submission. It was time for their macabre dance to begin.

    Just as the god finished speaking of his gift, Vee leaped. She took flight, using the air around her to her advantage. She flew higher and higher, observing everything in sight; she would need it later.

    The ruins of the city groaned beneath her as a light breeze sung past them, threatening their collapse. Vee took note of the various cracks and holes, noting certain aspects of each of the nearest buildings before she turned to look back down.

    “I’ll be waiting,” she shouted down before vanishing through a broken window. Instantly, her eyes began to adjust to the dim lighting, and she took her place, back against the wall and awaited her opponent’s arrival. In the meantime, she bit her thumb, allowing her blood to begin dripping into a pool in her hand.

    Each had moved their first pawn. What piece would be used next?





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    Have you checked out the featured roleplays yet? Here's this months featured roleplays - don't forget to make sure you submit your roleplays to see them featured in future!



    Extra Extra! Sign ups for the 30th Champion tournament will be opening soon! Get your weapons and get your armor, as you fight against other people for the chance to be crown a champion soldier of the world. If you win, you and your family will gain nobility for as long as there are champions.

    Are you looking to impress the women of your dreams? Become the champion and she will love you! Looking to raise your family from the slums of the earth? Become the champion and gain immeasurable wealth! Looking for fame and glory? There is no more respected and famous title than that of the Champions! Looking for power? Prove to the world that you are one of the most powerful fighters in the world!

    The 30th Champion Tournament

    -



    There was a time known as the Shattering, where the races of Terra fled for their lives as the world crumbles with disastrous events. Some even think that this is a way the gods punished them. Years after the Shattering, monsters began to conquer Terra's lush green lands and mountains, causing all of the world to form an alliance to fight back these monsters. The Great Reclamation began and ended years later.

    Until the words of an undead army began to rise far to the north of the main lands. A Nameless King lead an army of a thousand souls, each fueled with vengeance and anger. This haunting army marched closer, only to be crushed by a group of individuals that said to have the power of the gods - the Immortals. Years later, another army marched to the south and were utterly defeated by these god-wielding heroes.

    When something or someone dares to threaten Terra, the Immortals will surely return.

    Immortals: Reborn

    -



    A world drenched in astrology and fantasy, the 12 Zodiacs exist.

    At the first moment of the beginning of the time, a prophecy was given. At the 200th eclipse, 12 children would be born, in all corners of the world. Over time, these 'star children' would be brought together to fight in the greatest battle ever known: the battle of Shadow and Light.

    Each of the 12 children represent a different constellation, thus the name 'star child' and their associate with Light. But a dark force, Shadow, threatens to wipe out the Light forever. And somewhere in between reality and make believe, a land of Nightmares lies- Kishkandu, and is ruled over by Kuro, the Ruler of Darkness.

    ZODIACS: Dawn of a new War

    -



    As the mists of the newly discovered continent Pandaria unveiled, both the mighty Horde and the powerful Alliance staked claims to its lush lands. Ships from the two factions set sail for the island, but the seas were not kind. Many of the adventuring ships were wrecked aboard the island, leaving the remaining crew stranded on unfamiliar ground. As an unfortunate member of one of the Horde or Alliance crew, you find yourself stuck as a stranger in a strange land, among the native but hospitable Pandaren. While the Horde and Alliance crews fight, the Pandaren act as mediators between the warring factions. For a while, you almost feel hope of rescue.

    This is soon to change. A new threat rises in the dark jungles of Pandaria. The ancient race, mogu, that had once enslaved the Pandaren, have risen once more to reclaim their lands. Led by the ruthless general Wei Xian, the armies slaughter anyone in their way. Will you be able to overcome the hostilities of the factions and unite, or will the land fall to the might of Wei Xian?

    Warcraft: The Dark Heart of Wei Xian






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    by Notty

    Here we are once again, my fellow RPAians. Come in, settle down and put up your feet, and listen as we dive into the lives of some of our very own....



    First up on our list of interviewee's tonight, is the one and only... Kaptain Panty
    1. What do you miss from your childhood?
    There's not much I miss, because I was a dumb kid, as all children are. But I do miss sitting with my brother and playing vidja games, or more me watching him play video games. Now we don't have the time to do that kind of thing, what with jobs and what not.

    2. What is the funniest thing you have heard a child say?
    There was a guy dressed up as a clown and going around at night, freaking people out. My mother works at a primary school, and one of her children said this about him - "He's the killer clown. He catches you and kills you." I love it for it's simplicity.

    3. If you could see 24 hours into the future what would you do with this ability?
    Dunno. Guess make sure nothing bad happens and prevent it if something real bad is gonna happen?

    4. What are you afraid of?
    Used to be afraid of the dark, and I still kind of am if I've seen something kinda scary recently. An imagination can be cruel.

    5. If you could have a drink with someone from history who would it be?
    Pfffff, dunno. Can't really remember any historical figures, and I wouldn't want to bother'em anyway, or had better things to do in any case.

    6. What is the strangest talent that you have?
    Don't really have anything you'd consider strange. I guess you could say my proficiency with twirling round is a bit odd, but that's more of a skill. If I got any weird or whatever talents, I have yet to find them.


    Always witty and charming, it's....Splat
    1. What do you miss from your childhood?
    Something I miss... hmm, I'm gonna have to go with good cartoons. All the cartoons nowadays are really bad, with a few exceptions... What happened to shows like Avatar that were actually good? Smh...

    2. What is the funniest thing you have heard a child say?
    Technically I am a child. But, I can't really think of anything funny... I guess the kids I hang out with aren't as funny as they think they are...

    3. If you could see 24 hours into the future what would you do with this ability?
    To be honest, I probably wouldn't use it at all. Not much can happen in 24 hours, at least for me. So if I had to use it I'd probably just do it to see the lottery numbers or something. Because cheating pays off, kids!

    4. What are you afraid of?
    Clowns. Drowning. Heights (or, more specifically, falling from said height). Big rollercoasters (see heights). Probably more than that, but that's all I can think of.

    5. If you could have a drink with someone from history who would it be?
    Hmm, that's a tough one. So I'll give you three. First, Winston Churchill. He was a BAMF. Second, assuming I had a translator with me or something, Musashi Miyamoto. He was also a BAMF. And finally, Ronnie James Dio (the best rock singer ever).

    6. What is the strangest talent that you have?
    I don't know, I'm pretty normal. Does being really good at recognizing voice actors count as a talent? Cause I'm pretty good at that.


    Sporting a new look these days, its.....BumblingBee
    1. What do you miss from your childhood?
    I HAD THIS SUPER COOL TRIKE AND IT WAS THE BEST.
    Seriously, it had a squeaky horn on the front, and even a little bucket at the back that you could tip! It was in the coolest colours too :O

    2. What is the funniest thing you have heard a child say?
    I'm gonna cheat ever so slightly here, cause it's something my Mam tells me about all the damn time. I'm naturally more smaller and on the petite size compared to most, something little kids of course pick up on. So I was out shopping with the fam one day, and a little boy points right at me, and asks his mum,
    "Mummy, look at that small lady!"
    So apparently, I just stare point blank at this kid, and just say
    "Yeah but I ain't as small as your dick"
    I blame my brothers.

    3. If you could see 24 hours into the future what would you do with this ability?
    I'd do something completely and utterly different from what I'd seen. We ain't here forever, may as well spice things up with some variety

    4. What are you afraid of?
    F R O G S
    I hate them. They're disgusting.
    We live right by a pond too, so they're always hopping into the garden whenever it rains :(

    5. If you could have a drink with someone from history who would it be?
    Che Guevara.
    I've only become fascinated with him recently and he was an absolutely incredible human being who is horribly misrepresented in the West. His outlook on life is enlightening and he was an all around gem of a human being. We lost the man far too soon.

    6. What is the strangest talent that you have?
    I have a few weird ones,
    -I can do Marge Simpsons laugh.
    -I'm hyper flexible so I can sit with my knees literally bent backwards, it looks gross but it's SOOPER comfy.
    -I can recite a entire verse from Richard II.
    -I can swear in Italian.




    by Notty

    *fanfare*
    JULY!

    Wait, you mean to tell me that the year is already more than half over?! What!
    *scrambles around to get stuff done*


    In the mean time, check out the happenings of this month in history!


    July 1
    Can you hear me now? The first international call between Canada and the US is made on this day in 1881.
    Princess Diana was born on this day in 1961.

    July 2
    A mystery that still beguiles us today- Amelia Earhart's plane disappears as she attempts the first round-the-world flight, in 1937.

    July 3
    One of the bloodiest battles in American history, the Battle of Gettysburg, comes to an end on this day in 1863.

    July 4
    We're all a little mad here... "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland" is first published on this day in 1865.

    July 5
    "Oh gravity, thou art a heartless...(well..you know!)" Sir Isaac Newton describes the Law of Gravity on this day in 1687.

    July 6
    "Yo Adrian!" Sylvester Stallone, best known for his "Rocky Balboa" movies, was born this day in 1949.

    July 7
    25 years after she was put to death, Joan of Arc was determined to be innocent in 1456.

    July 8
    We will always have Paris... The city of Paris was founded on this day in 951.

    July 9
    The Battle of Normandy began this day in 1944.
    He brought you "Joe vs the Volcano", "Sleepless in Seattle", "You've Got Mail", "That Thing You Do", and countless other 'classics'- Tom Hanks was born this day in 1956.

    July 10
    In 1856, a scientist who would later make huge advances in electricity- Nikola Tesla, was born.

    July 11
    The Great Bambino- Babe Ruth- plays his first Major League baseball game in 1914.

    July 12
    Born on this day in 1971, one of the greatest female figure skaters- Kristi Yamaguchi.

    July 13
    On this glorious, glorious day, only 2 years apart, two legends were born! First, in 1940, the illustrious and unforgettable Patrick Stewart, aka, Captain Picard on Star Trek. And secondly, the ruggedly handsome and ever adventurous, Harrison Ford, aka, Indiana Jones and Han Solo!

    July 14
    Mariner 4 takes the first ever close-up shots of Mars on this day in 1965.

    July 15
    Famous Dutch artist, Remembrandt Van Rijn, was born this day in 1606.

    July 16
    The first plutonium-based test nuclear weapon is detonated in the US, ushering in the Atomic Age, in 1945.

    July 17
    "Where dreams come true!" Disneyland opened on this day in 1955 in California.

    July 18
    The chip processor company, Intel, was founded on this day in 1968.

    July 19
    Famous artist, Edgar Degas, was born this day in 1834.

    July 20
    On this day in 1940, Billboard Magazine publishes its first list of 'most popular songs'.

    July 21
    He brought you Mrs. Doubtfire, RV, the Genie from Aladdin- actor Robin Williams was born on this day in 1951.

    July 22
    On this day in 1933, Wiley Post becomes the first person to fly solo around the world.

    July 23
    In 1829, the typewriter is first invented.
    The lovable kid with the lightning scar, (well, not really...) Daniel Radcliffe, best known for portraying Harry Potter, was born this day in 1989.

    July 24
    Amelia Earhart is born this day in 1897.
    Apollo 11, the first mission to put a man on the moon, safely splashes into the Pacific Ocean on this day in 1969.

    July 25
    Constantine 1 is declared emperor of Rome by Roman troops in 306.

    July 26
    Takin' in back to the 90's- Sonic the Hedgehog, the video game, was released on this day in 1991.

    July 27
    The classic character from our childhood, Bugs Bunny, makes his first debut in "A Wild Hare" in 1940.

    July 28
    In 1493, the Great Fire in Moscow, Russia occurs.

    July 29
    The first installation of the epic trilogy- "The Fellowship of the Ring" is published this day in 1954.
    Will Wheaton, aka Wesley Crusher on Star Trek, was born this day in 1972.

    July 30
    On this day in 1954, Elvis made his first debut as a public performer (watch out for those hips!)

    July 31
    "After all this time?"
    "Always."
    JK Rowling, author of the Harry Potter series, was born this day in 1965.




    by Notty

    This month, we've had quite a few interesting and talented new artists come into the light here at RPA. Curious as to what they're about? Tune in and see- then head on over to their artist's corner and drop in some love!


    ----------

    Ever wanted a drawing of something, but (if you're like me) the communication between your hand and your head isn't the best? Well fear not! Head on over to Emet draws things and see the skills of an artist! Something you'd like to see? Just post, and voila! Wait for your masterpiece to appear!

    ----------

    If you're a Magic The Gathering fan, like I know some of you are, then you should check out MTG card alteration by Mori. Here, our talented artist takes the already beautiful artistry on the MTG cards and extends and adds to it! Some of them are truly remarkable! Go take a look!

    ----------

    And finally, you may have seen some of this artist's work in the RPA Telephone Game during RPApril! If you're looking for some simply remarkable pieces of work, check out Issy's Droodles.


    Spoiler: Great New RP's looking for players! 
    Click here daily to vote for RPA!

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    by Kris


    (to be read from right to left)





    by Dnafein

    It's time for everyones favorite make people laugh event: Caption This.

    The rules are simple - each month, we will provide you with two funny images off the internet. Your job is to come up with a funny comment, caption or speech bubble for one of the two images (or both if you are super inspired). You will have three weeks to submit your caption to any of the Tribune staff members, (please make sure you title it Caption This entry). During the last week, the two funniest captions will be selected by the staff and featured in the next release of the tribune.

    Find a funny image that you think will fit? Feel free to send it to any of the Tribune staff members (please make sure you title it Caption This suggestion) and who knows - perhaps it will be the next to participate in "Caption This".

    Rules:
    - All RPA rules apply
    - Limit only one submission per picture (max two submissions each month)
    - Be creative! Don't copy memes already made!
    - Have fun!

    Spoiler: Caption option 1 

    Spoiler: Caption option 2 











    July 2016





    As of writing this I am sick. Not the sort of fun sick that helps you get off school/work, no this sort of thing that makes your whole body feel like on big aching mess. Also my head starts to pound when I watch the screen too long. So of course the perfect cure for all of this is of course animation.

    Animation has always been my first nerdy love. Which is true for a lot of us I presume. After all most of us grew up on cartoons and can talk about the things we watched as kids with deep passion. Some of us leave it behind when we grow up but others like me go deep.

    The world of animation outside of the two giants (USA and Japan) is vibrant and deep. From the soviet era cartoons of Soyuzmultfilm to the interesting view on african cultures through the lens of french animators of the Kirikou series. So lend me your eyes and let me proselytize to you briefly about all of this. Now I must say this one of those lists that I could make a top 50 quite easily so I decided to add a honorable mentions section to the beginning of this list as well as adding a Dark Horse Pick.

    With all that said to the list:




    Spoiler: Honorabel Mentions 


    Spoiler: 5. The Adventures of Pinochio 


    Spoiler: 4. Lotte From Gadetville 


    Spoiler: 3. Kirikou and the Sorceress 


    Spoiler: 2. The Adventures of Prince Achmed 


    Spoiler: Dark Horse: Rocks In My Pockets 


    Spoiler: 1. The Complete Works of Yuri Norstein 





    That's the list for this month!
    Vote for next months topic here: (link to be added in post)





    by Dnafein


    Spoiler: Video 


    7 days to die is a zombie survival game similar to both minecraft and Dayz. It's an excellent game and I recommend it for whatever platform you use to game.

    Enjoy-ability: 4/5
    Graphics: 4/5
    Accessibility: 5/5
    Overall:9/10

    Sorry bout the shirt....




    Spoiler: Great New RP's looking for players! 
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    SO AWESOME

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