With no better ideas, it wasn’t long before the two of them decided to just head to another motel for the time being. The second trip passed in similar fashion to the first. The whir of the ticket machines and platform safety announcements. The clanking and rumbling of train carriages, and the murmur of gentle conversation. Subtle glances at strangers and the shuffling of feet. The conductor’s voice, scrambled beyond comprehension by terrible speakers, and the screech of breaks. Anxiety, tension, awkwardness and fear. Natalie could only pray that neither of them had cause to get used to these trips any time soon. That they came up with a solution sometime soon.
Checking in at the motel went much more smoothly this time, now that Natalie had access to her own savings again. The proceedings felt like a formality, almost, and it wasn’t long before Natalie and Luuk slipped into their room, keys in hand. Their new accommodations felt depressingly similar to the previous ones. Oh, the styles were different, certainly, but that was about all that had changed. The layout was in that same, familiar pattern that all bottom-rung motels seemed to share. Natalie took one glance around the room and immediately suspected that she knew exactly where everything was kept, even without looking. Still, there was nothing to be done about it. She dumped her bag, dug out a marker, and quickly set about helping Luuk fortify their room, in much the same manner as before.
Once they had finished preparing, Natalie disappeared into the bathroom for a brief moment, just to wash the ink off her hands. Not one to remain idle for long, she set about unpacking almost immediately after she returned. At least, until Luuk broke his uncharacteristic silence, and asked his next question. She froze, a folded jacket still cupped in her hands. She stayed silent, her gaze distant, as Luuk continued to speak, and she considered how best to respond.
She absolutely despised the idea of their magic turned towards such dark purposes. That this force they commanded, so often used for creation and rebirth, might instead be twisted towards destruction and death. Such spells did exist, of course- she had used one herself recently, to get them out of trouble when they were attacked at her old apartment. Even so, she was loathe to share them with her student. And yet, Luuk’s request wasn’t entirely unreasonable, considering their current circumstances. If such a spell could protect him, help keep him safe, then…well, maybe teaching them to him was another thing she owed him. Another step towards redemption. No matter how it hurt her.
As he pondered her options, Natalie’s mind inevitably drifted towards the gun. Metal forged by more traditional means, but with the same deadly purpose. A method of defense that wasn’t a perversion of their art. It was tucked away into the bottom of her bag, with the magazine removed and the safety on. It would be a simple thing, to take it out and hand it over. Perhaps she could convince him that was enough. But…no. No. She had seen the way Luuk had reacted to it before, and such a weapon was terrible enough in its own right.
When she had decided on her answer, Natalie slowly set down the jacket she was holding, before turning to face Luuk properly. She fought hard to keep her expression neutral, her tone casual. Anything to convince him – and herself – that this was just another lesson, the same as any other.
“Our magic is too situational for one or two spells to provide you with all the solutions you could want. But…I can give you the pieces. So that you can try and cobble something together yourself, should the need arise. Maybe a few common examples.” The words felt thick and heavy on her tongue, but there was no going back now. She turned back towards her bag, and reached for the same marker that she had used to help redesign their old bedroom locks, just a few moments earlier. “Get your notebook.” Only when the two of them were seated, poised over an open page, would she begin in earnest.
“You probably won’t be able to test a lot of these things out now. Not without drawing a whole lot of attention, and destroying our brand new rooms. So you’ll have to make do with the theory for now. Ready?” Once she had Luuk’s confirmation, Natalie would put pen to paper, and begin their lesson in earnest.
After drawing out several blank circles on one page, she’d show him a handful of new markings he could use. Lines that could sharpen an edge, or create one. Lines that would let him break whatever he touched, provided it was made of wood, or metal, or stone. She’d even show him a few useful ways to combine the two, that could prove helpful in common situations. Ways to collapse a floor, or a wall, like she had done at her old apartment. A full sigil he could use to shatter a window, and leave himself with at least one piece of glass that could function as a makeshift knife.
There were darker spells than those, of course. Natalie knew of ways to rend flesh and splinter bones. With a mere brush of her hand and enough ill intent, she could cripple, kill, or even break minds. Forbidden things. Spells that she would only ever use as a last resort, and had gladly buried in the back of her mind for the past ten years. Even now, she shuddered to think of them. Those she would not teach. Not yet, and hopefully not ever. That was where she drew the line. Luuk would have to make do with more mundane methods.
Once she’d laid out her examples, she’d pass Luuk the pen, straighten up in her seat, and ask him to copy them onto the next page.
She’d sit back and watch as Luuk worked. Every stroke of his pen felt like he were driving a stake closer to her heart. Each completed tragedy felt like it were tearing free another piece of her soul. But even so, Natalie tried to find solace in the fact that this knowledge might help keep her young student safe. Tried to justify this choice to herself.
After watching Luuk work in silence for a moment, Natalie would clear her throat. She didn’t want to distract him while he was still processing this new lesson, but her conscience demanded that she speak. “I know it probably goes without saying, but I feel the need to make it clear anyway. These techniques are only ever to be used for self-defense. If I ever find out you’ve used them for anything else…” Natalie’s voice trailed off, and the teacher realised she didn’t know how to finish that sentence. How would she ever punish him, if she found he had done something so ghastly? Would she even be able to? Natalie had to suppress a shiver, and quickly shoved the thought aside. “I’m not saying you would. I wouldn’t have taught you them if I thought there was a risk of that. But for the sake of my own conscience…” she started, before trailing off again. God, she was making such a mess of this, wasn’t she? Hopefully she’d said enough for Luuk to understand what she was getting at.
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