[M] What Once Was Lost [Namingtoohard & Ashen]

[Namingtoohard]

Now that she had given her young student his first real task, Natalie was content to sit back and try to relax. For the time being, at the very least. She made no attempt to interrupt Luuk’s contemplative silence, perfectly happy to wait and see where his thoughts – and her teachings – led him. without any sort of external help. Natalie tried to maintain the same detached air of a teacher observing an exam, but her success was limited. There was no hiding the small, amused smile that turned up the corners of her mouth as he fished the key from his pocket, and ran his fingers over the lock itself.

Luuk’s first answer was the conclusion she had hoped he would draw, more or less. She couldn’t help but feel a hint of satisfaction at that. There was something gratifying about seeing a student absorb your words, and extract some sort of tangible benefit from them. The second answer he gave, however, was a little more surprising. Luuk dismissed the answer she had been expecting, and opted for something even more complex instead. The boy made a very good point, actually – she hadn’t considered the possibility of a master key bypassing any of the more subtle changes she had planned. Natalie tried to keep her expression under control, lest she give things away too readily. That little spark of extra creativity was a promising sign, however, and she found herself eager to see where his current line of reasoning led them.

When Luuk plucked a notebook from his bad and started to draw, Natalie let her curiosity get the better of her. She rose from her perch and moved as if to join him, so that she might cast a wandering eye over his designs. When it was offered to her, she took it readily, and spent a moment examining Luuk’s design. Truth be told, she didn’t know a great deal about warding locks. Not the full intricacies of how the internal mechanism worked, at the very least. But between Luuk’s rambling and the quick drawing he had presented her with, Natalie found the idea novel. Her mind raced as she tried to come up with the sigil he might use. She had a few ideas, but wouldn’t know for certain until she tested them herself…or watched Luuk do it. Now she had more than one reason to hope that his plan worked.

When Luuk began to work in earnest, Natalie lent him the benefit of her experience. She cast an eye over the designs as he worked, and found his choices rather similar to one of the possibilities she had found herself considering. When he was finished, Natalie thought herself as confident as she could be in an untested design.

“…I think that should do it. Go ahead and give it a try” Natalie offered, gesturing towards the door with one hand. She’d retreat to her previous spot atop one of the beds and settle back into her impromptu seat to watch, quite eager to see how this little experiment of his turned out. They had it close enough to avoid any real disasters, she thought, so there seemed little harm in letting him test out his creation.

When his attempt proved successful, just a few moments later, Natalie was nothing short of delighted. For just a moment, she was able to forget the bleak realities of their current situation, and made no attempt to hide it. The teacher let out a delighted giggle and clapped her hands once, before leaving them clasped together. It wasn’t every day that she got to learn a new trick, experienced as she was. Even more than that, it really did speak to the promise Luuk was showing. That alone wasn’t enough to justify her decision in endangering him, Natalie knew, but at least he would be able to make good use of his gift. It would be just a moment before she moved on to more tangible, more direct methods of praise.

“Oh, well done, Luuk! I’m rather impressed. If I’m being totally honest, I had only expected you to change the brand of lock, so that the old key no longer fit. You’ve gone well and truly beyond what I had imagined. We’ll make a master out of you yet!”

After a moment, Natalie would finally lower her hands. She seemed to relax a little, but the twinkle in her eyes lingered. She’d let the silence stretch again, giving them both a moment to take in Luuk’s new success, before she’d finally move on. His work wasn’t done yet, after all.

“Perhaps we shouldn’t celebrate too soon. You still need to make a key that matches your fancy new lock. It won’t do us any good if we’re trapped in here and need to change it back to get out, right? Still, after what you just managed, I don’t imagine it’ll be too difficult.”

She could have offered to do it herself, of course, but why deprive her student of another chance to practice? Besides, given that her knowledge of warded locks was much more dubious, Natalie wasn’t entirely confident that she could make a matching key. Better to leave this task to the expert, relatively speaking.

[Ashen]

Luuk was warmed by Natalie’s words, and even if he was quickly growing tired from all the brainstorming and drawing, he was filled with a new energy to continue impressing his mentor. Her words sent a pale blush rising to his cheeks, and he turned away to conceal it. He couldn’t hide his smile, however, shy and almost boyish but filled with pride. If Natalie believed he could be a master… Was she just saying that? Luuk exercised the thought anyway. The grad student-turned-mage, rewriting the histories he’d spent so long chasing. He wondered then if his parents would have been proud of him.

He turned back to Natalie when she reminded him there was still more to do. He retrieved his key to the room and stared at it, building up the courage to attempt the next part of his transformation. The lock had been hard enough, with its countless possibilities, but now he had to replicate the wards he’d created perfectly. Even the smallest error in design would keep the key from turning and unlocking the door. He excused himself again to wash the ink from his hands, and when he returned, he was mumbling about how red his hands were. His skin was agitated, and he figured it couldn’t take many more mistakes, so unless he wanted to admit to Natalie he couldn’t do this, he had to get it right.

The new circle was similar to the last, though smaller, and again Luuk dictated what he was doing and why. He was more cautious this time, working slower to mark his lines and measure his angles. When he finished the new design, he showed it to his teacher before setting it into the key. The ridges twisted into a new pattern, a maze of Luuk’s making, and he could only hope it matched the one already in the lock. The test was waiting for him.

“Now we should see how I did,” he said, voice wavering on unconfident again. “Please… Let me in if I fail.” He took the new key and left the room, letting the door close softly behind him. Luuk scanned the hall to ensure no one was watching, then tried the newly formed key into his lock. It caught in the wards, but jiggling it a bit caused the key to turn and the door to open. He let himself back in the room with a wide smile. “I did it,” he breathed, looking down at the key in his hands. Luuk beamed, but his expression fell when he realized they both had keys to the room. He accepted Natalie’s key and, hand sore already, he made the right circle and changed her key too. After they tested that, they could be confident they had a pair of working keys, the only two that could open their door.

Now they could celebrate. “Did you see that?” he said, motioning towards the key in his hands. “I feel like I’m creating my own language or something. It’s crazy. Things are still weird, but they’re starting to make sense.” He met her eye, and for a moment he shied under her gaze. Natalie looked motherly, had that gleam in her expression as if she was truly proud. Luuk had seen that gleam before, had known it well during his studies from his favorite teacher. “You remind me of one of my history professors,” he said with a laugh. “Dr. V. He always believed in me, you know? But he was a man of science. He and I got into tons of arguments about the validity of different cultures’ spiritual and religious customs… I wonder what he would think of all this.” Luuk dismissed the thought with a wave. “That’s not so important now,” he said, more to himself than to Natalie. “I think we should be safe for now.”

He plopped down onto his bed and rested his head on the pillow. The exhaustion was starting to claim him, but an anxious part of him wanted to stay up, wanted to make sure nothing would happen to them. He didn’t know which side would win out. There were still so many questions he had for Natalie, but now wasn’t the time. Tomorrow, he decided. Tomorrow they could come up with a game plan, and he could find out more about what was going on. “Get some rest,” he suggested, voice a sleepy pitch. It was early yet, but time hardly seemed to matter anymore. They needed to be rested, in case someone found them, in case they had to think quickly, in case they needed to find a way to survive.

[Namingtoohard]

Just like the first time, Natalie was patient as her student ran through the motions again, moving off to wash his hands. She knew the struggles of their craft better than anyone else alive, and was pointedly aware that Luuk was technically still a novice, even if his rapidly-growing skill suggested otherwise. He showed a great deal of promise, but experience mattered just as much as talent, by all counts. That was half the reason she was having him practice now, whilst they had the opportunity. The other half? Well…after the events of that day, she thought they could both use a little bit of a distraction.

Natalie watched on and listened in with the same casual focus as Luuk began constructing his second sigil of the evening. She felt a little less useful this time, however. Her lack of knowledge surrounding warded locks in general, and the shape of the wards Luuk had already made, meant that she could really only offer technical expertise. Still, she was confident that he would succeed. In Natalie’s opinion, this would be the easier of his two tasks tonight, and he had managed the first without any real difficulty.

When Luuk eventually declared himself finished, Natalie nodded in agreement with his proposed plan. The idea of leaving him trapped outside was amusing enough to make her chuckle, but she never would have followed through with it. In another time, perhaps. Given their current circumstances, however, she wouldn’t dream of leaving him locked outside, just in case. She stayed put as Luuk let himself out, and pulled the door closed behind him. She waited with baited breath to see if her student would be able to let himself back in, or if she would need to go and rescue him. And when he succeeded, her excitement almost rivalled his own.

“I saw” Natalie offered in answer to Luuk’s outpouring; a lacklustre response, perhaps, but she wanted to let him enjoy his moment of triumph. Despite her short words, however, there was no mistaking the glimmer of pride in Natalie’s eyes. It had lingered after his first success, and only grown in strength now, after the second. Seeing her student grow brought about a sense of satisfaction stronger than she had expected. Was this how her teachers had felt, every time she had mastered a new skill? Perhaps, in another time, she might have become one of them herself. What a novel thought.

Once his excitement faded, their discussion turned to more practical matters again. Luuk’s suggestion that they get some rest was well-timed, but Natalie still had a little more work to do first. “We still have to sort out the windows, but I’ll do that myself. You’ve impressed me enough for one night, and I feel the need to practice a little bit too, now” she answered, smiling toothily. “You go ahead and start winding down if you like. I’ll join you in just a moment.”

Moving with the calm grace lent by clear purpose, Natalie claimed the pen for herself, and quickly set to work. It wasn’t long before she’d finished constructing her own circle, and she applied it to the window’s frame with the same no-nonsense approach. When she stepped away, the window bore not just its original key-lock, but a more traditional latch. The sort that could only be opened from the inside. That done, she’d set about getting ready for bed herself. A quick trip to the bathroom left her with clean hands again, and she’d quickly flick off the lights as she passed. From there, it was a simple matter of finding her bed in the dark and crawling into it. Easier said than done in an unfamiliar room, but by no means difficult.

Natalie slept poorly that night. A fact that was altogether unsurprising, considering the events of the previous day, and her own personal history of bad dreams. She woke with a start and bolted upright quickly, before finally remembering where they were, and why. A quick glance at the curtains was enough for her to tell that the sun was only just starting to peek over the horizon, and had only just begun to beat back the night’s chill darkness. A similar look across at the other bed revealed a mostly shapeless form buried under the covers, suggesting that Luuk was still asleep.

Not wanting to wake him, Natalie did her best to be quiet as she rose. Fully aware that she wouldn’t be getting any more sleep before it was time to be about their business, she decided to leave Luuk with some peace and quiet, and seek out breakfast instead. Without bothering to change, she claimed her key and slipped out of the room without bothering to change.

She’d return a little bit later, with a steaming hot cup of coffee in each hand, and a small paper bag tucked under one arm. Natalie would push the door open with her hip and peer inside, trying to gauge whether or not her young charge was still asleep.

[Ashen]

Even with Natalie’s permission to get ready for bed and leave the windows to her, Luuk couldn’t sit by idly. He sat in bed but kept an eye on what she was doing, watching from a distance as she crafted her circle, silently guessing at the lines she used. He’d done a lot today, but he didn’t have the luxury of laziness anymore. The more he learned, and the quicker, the better. The more chances he had to save them, if it came down to that, much as he hoped it didn’t. Once Natalie finished, he could breathe a little easier knowing they were protected in the anonymity of their room.

Luuk debated washing the rest of the ink from his hands and arms, but after all the scrubbing earlier, he thought it better to give his skin a rest and try to get it all off tomorrow. He picked up one of the bags he’d brought and sifted through the various pockets before realizing he’d forgotten to bring a toothbrush. It was such a trivial thing, but it served as a stark reminder of the danger they were in, the life they now had. He plopped down on his bed, and, thoughts still racing, he closed his eyes and tried to shut out the rest of the world.

He had little success. As much as Luuk tried, he couldn’t silence his thoughts, and as he lay there, he figured sleep had abandoned him for the night. He was drowning in all his doubts, the uncertainty about the future. He wanted nothing more than to will it all away, convince himself he had some test to study for, some project to do, and that he’d march right back to campus for another semester, another year, not a child but certainly not yet an adult, and especially not a fugitive. But that life was gone, and now, he was trusting his life to the stranger who had endangered him, who had promised him a world of knowledge he’d never known. He was a fool for following her, absolutely, but what did that matter now? Now he had to deal with the consequences of his curiosity, deal with the people who wanted him dead, and learn more about the magic that had always been within him.

He eventually did sleep, but his dreams were no more peaceful than his conscious thoughts. Faces flashed through his mind: his foster parents, his roommate, his friends, his professors; all the people he may never see again. They surrounded him, each wielding a gun like the man from before, each smiling a wide, Cheshire smile. Try as he might have, there was nothing Luuk could do to get his body to move.

He woke with a start, eyes wildly scanning the room in search of even a drop of familiarity. Natalie was missing, and immediately he thought the worst. They had found her, in the middle of the night, and not wanting to endanger Luuk further, she had left silently and alone. Luuk shook his head, scolding himself. She wouldn’t just leave him like that, not without warning, and besides, he doubted he would have been able to sleep through such a thing anyway. But the paranoia settled in his throat, and he grabbed for his phone to search the site of every local news company for her name, just in case.

Though Natalie wasn’t gone long, the minutes stretched towards eternity. When the doorknob began to turn, Luuk looked up, panic settling across his face. It was one of them, one of the people who wanted him dead; what could he do? He had his shoddy magic, but where had he left his pen? Did he have a blade of some sort? There was the plastic fork from last night’s supper still in the trash, greasy and hard to use; would that work? But when he saw Natalie enter the room, his thoughts faded, and he let out a breath. He could have laughed at himself under different circumstances. “Hi,” he mumbled, trying to work the worry out of his voice. Noticing the things in her hands, he got up to help her. He set the cupholder on the nightstand between their beds. “Is this for me?” he asked, pointing to one of the two cups. “You didn’t have to. Thank you.”

Heart still hammering over the scare, Luuk took one of the coffee cups and let it settle between his hands, warming his palms. Natalie had just gone out for breakfast? There was no harm in that, of course, and it wasn’t his place to scold her, but a part of him thought of the dangers, the people who could have seen her, who could have followed her back to this room… You’re being paranoid, Luuk told himself, trying hard to dismiss the thoughts. Besides, you need to eat.

The coffee was hot down his throat, but it was a welcome warmth. “Have you been awake long?” he asked, trying to make small talk to distract himself from his thoughts. After the exhaustion of yesterday, he imagined they would have both fallen asleep instantly, but maybe Natalie had had trouble sleeping as well. “I didn’t see anything on the news,” he said, motioning to his phone. Though it was still early. There was plenty of time for people to find out about them, and then what? Luuk shook his head, willing the negativity away. “What’s in the bag?”

[Namingtoohard]

Natalie did her best to stay quiet as she peered into their room, but her efforts were quickly proven redundant. Luuk’s voice greeted her almost immediately, rendering any attempts at stealth pointless. A part of her was relieved – not because she was concerned that something had happened to him during her absence, but because it meant she wouldn’t have to tiptoe about and risk waking him. Without any further pomp, Natalie pushed her way into the room with her hip, before nudging the door closed behind her. Once she heard the latch click into place, Natalie took a few steps towards Luuk's bed. She quickly passed the cupholder off into his hands when he met her halfway, grateful for the assistance.

“I wasn’t sure how you normally like your coffee, so I just got you a cappuccino. Hope that’s alright. There’s some sugar packets there too, if you need them” Natalie offered idly, by the way of an answer. Naturally, she had ordered an espresso for herself, given how poorly she had slept. Now that her hands were free, she made the short journey back towards the closed door, and quickly slipped the lock into place; something she’d been unable to do the first time. An unspoken reminder of the danger they were currently in, albeit a subtle one.

With the most pressing matters taken care of, Natalie helped herself to a seat atop her own bed, still messy from the previous night, and set about nursing her own coffee. She’d help herself to that delightful first sip, already anticipating the blissful moment when the caffeine would first kick in, and begin to lift the veil of drowsiness from her mind. They had a lot to do today, but Natalie wasn’t willing to start until she was feeling at least partially awake. Her next answer didn’t come until she had lowered her cup again, albeit temporarily.

“Breakfast. I already ate mine outside.” Natalie’s answer was accompanied by a casual toss of the brown paper bag, which sent it sailing over the small gap between their beds, to land amongst Luuk's tangled sheets. When her student looked inside, he’d find a single ham and cheese croissant, still warm, and a handful of napkins. It was a pitiful meal, all things considered, but it was the best Natalie had been able to manage with the loose change she’d had on hand. They’d start eating a little better once she got access to her accounts again, fate permitting. Today’s first real order of business.

“I’ve been up for…longer than I care to admit. Last night was rough” Natalie admitted, after a moment of silence, and another sip of coffee. She didn’t dwell on the thought for long, though. Instead, she decided to rush ahead, and on to matters that she deemed more important. Hopefully Luuk would consider their current circumstances and the events of the previous day to be explanation enough, and wouldn’t push for too much more information. She wasn't sure how much more she was ready to admit, much less how much he was read to hear.

“As soon as I’m done with my coffee, I’m going to head to the bank. See if I can’t convince some clueless teller that I lost my purse, and get access to my accounts again. After that, it’ll be time for some shopping. I’ll try and get my hands on some of the essentials we were forced to leave behind” Natalie offered. A summary of her plans for the day…or the earlier parts of it, at the very least. Yet another sip of coffee followed, before she’d continue. “You’re free to tag along, if you like, but it probably won’t be the most exciting trip.”

[Ashen]

The breakfast was graciously accepted with an enthusiastic thank-you as Luuk grabbed the wrapped sandwich from the bag. Grease had leaked through the wrapped to coat his fingers, and he absently dabbed at it with a napkin. What was an unhealthy and undesirable meal to Natalie was a normal breakfast to the former university student, and even if he didn’t feel very up to eating, he was happy to have something in his stomach.

She didn’t seem very happy, and he couldn’t blame her. Though he appreciated the honesty of her answer, Luuk frowned at the implication that she had slept just as poorly as he had, or worse. A part of him wanted to ask if she wanted to talk about it, but he had a feeling it wouldn’t help, that it would make her uncomfortable like all the other things they still had to talk about, and besides, what good would her sharing her worries be if they only made his worse? So he sat awkwardly wondering what he should do, what he could say, to make things the smallest bit better. When he came up with nothing, he remained silent, idly picking at his croissant.

Talk of leaving their room made him no more comfortable. Luuk shifted, wondering if it was safe to go to the bank, and when it would be safe to return to Natalie’s place so that she didn’t have to pretend to be someone she was not. She was much more collected about the idea, but then, she had done this before, had likely had to lie to a lot of people… The thought unnerved him, and he tried to dismiss it. At least having access to her bank accounts would help them to survive, or at the very least live on more than greasy fast food. He considered going with her, then remembered the man who had threatened them, who would be looking for them both. Besides, he tried to reason with himself, Natalie would have a better chance convincing people she was down on her luck if she went in by herself, right? “I think I should stay here,” he said, “you know, take care of a few things.” Even as he spoke, he was trying to reason with himself that he would be safe alone, too.

When he finished his breakfast, Luuk wiped his fingers with his remaining napkins and glanced at his phone. He had several missed notifications, including messages and calls from people he wasn’t allowed to tell the truth. One message, from his roommate, asked after his whereabouts, and though Luuk appreciated the first year’s concern, he resented the student’s inopportune timing in taking an interest in his schedule. He had a missed call and a voicemail from his mother, which gave him pause. Karen rarely called him, and seeing her name on his screen sent a new wave of panic crashing through his body.

He looked up then, finding Natalie with his gaze, and coughed awkwardly. “Right,” he mumbled, “I’m going to take a shower. You don’t have to wait for me.” After he’d thrown out the now-empty bag and coffee cup, he selected an outfit for himself from the bag he’d brought. He was careful to pick something simple, dark; even if he was being paranoid, adhering to the strange fashion rules his anxiety supplied at least made him feel better. Then, with a nod goodbye to Natalie, he stepped into the bathroom.

The water never did get hot. He knew he wasn’t staying in a fancy hotel, but still, the lack of a common commodity irked him. Eventually the water settled at a lukewarm temperature, and he let it wash over his skin. The motel-provided soap was small and smelled of nothing, and Luuk found himself missing the cheap soap he’d always bought, with the light scent he’d never quite noticed before now. He finished his shower and emerged from the bathroom to find Natalie gone. Luuk dressed quickly, then looked at his reflection in the bathroom mirror. He looked as exhausted as he felt, dark rings settled around his eyes deeper than they’d ever been, even after the many late-night study sessions he’d had. He suddenly resented the pale color of his hair, too blonde to camouflage well, but he soon ridiculed himself at the thought. He wasn’t a spy; he didn’t need to blend in with his surroundings as if he were in some strange espionage movie. Still, the thought wavered, and he wondered if his sticking out would be the difference between life and death.

It took several minutes for Luuk to find the confidence to leave the room. He reached for the doorknob and, deciding against it, sat back down on his bed and again scrolled through the notifications on his phone. He listened to the voicemail his mother left him. She had only been calling about a question regarding his graduation, but the worry was clear in her voice as she asked Luuk why he hadn’t picked up, if everything was okay, and to call us when you get the chance. We love you. He couldn’t dream of telling her the truth, of making that concern worse. Though it ached to do so, Luuk dismissed the voicemail and cleared out the rest of his notifications. Heart heavy, he finally left the room, not at all ready to face the world again.

Luuk hadn’t set out with a destination in mind, and he didn’t even know why he was leaving the safety of his room, but a part of him needed to be free, to convince himself that he was not already confined in a cell of his own making. The train was filled with strangers turned criminals, and as the elderly woman reached into her purse for a tissue, Luuk braced himself for the gunshots. He was suspicious of everyone now, even the familiar man at the train station who greeted him and knew him by name. Once off the train, he quickly made his way through campus, to his dorms, where he lingered outside his door, listening for any sound of his roommate. Finding none, he let himself in and, overwhelmed to be faced with the life he could no longer have, he collapsed on the floor.

He left his dorm with a bag thrown over his shoulder and tried to convince himself he did not look like he was looting his own room. On the way back through campus, he heard a familiar voice call out to him. He turned to find his history professor, coffee cup in hand and brow arched.

“Are you alright, Luuk?” Dr. Vetere often knew what was bothering Luuk before he did, but the former student now did not know how to answer.

“I’m just getting things ready to go,” Luuk supplied, a forced smile across his lips.

Dr. Vetere glanced towards where Luuk was headed. “Your mother isn’t helping you move out?”

Luuk shifted. “I’m going somewhere else for a little bit. Staying with a friend. Trying to take what I can by foot, you know?”

The answer didn’t seem to satisfy the professor, but he nodded anyway. “Well, I’ll see you at graduation, Luuk.”

“Yes,” Luuk said all too quickly, and he continued away, trying to hide the drumming in his chest.

He arrived back at the motel without incident, and he stocked the bathroom with his soaps, grasping for whatever normalcy he could get. He set a box of crackers between his bed and Natalie’s, the only snacks he had had in his dorm that were not stale. Finally, as he sat back down on his bed, he realized with dread that he had not yet heard from Natalie, and he sent her a text to make sure nothing had happened. That she was still alive. Completely forgetting she did not even have her phone.

[Namingtoohard]

Natalie nodded her mute agreement when Luuk decided he would stay behind. She wasn’t entirely sure what other business he had to attend to, but quickly decided against prying. Despite the fact that Luuk was her student, despite the burden of responsibility she felt, despite her need to keep him safe, he was technically an adult, and entitled to his own privacy. Natalie’s manipulation had gotten him into this mess; she owed him a great deal more than a little bit of freedom. A part of her wanted to stay close, so that she would be close enough to help if something else went wrong, but…well, she couldn’t really guarantee that where she was going was any safer, either.

“Alright. I guess I’ll see you later this afternoon, then.” Without any further ado, Natalie slipped out the door and was gone, into the biting wind beyond. While she walked out towards the street, she made a point of tapping all her pockets idly, as if to check she had all the necessities with her. It was only after confirming she still had her key that Natalie remembered that she had lost both her phone and wallet in the incident at her apartment, and hunting down replacements was one of her main priorities today. Feeling slightly foolish, she shoved her hands into her pockets and made her way out into the street beyond.

Her trip towards the nearest bank was short, but uncomfortable. The fading morning chill had been replaced by an uncomfortably sharp breeze, which seemed to cut through her limited wardrobe with little effort. The morning sun provided little in the way of relief, and left Natalie shivering rather quickly. Even so, that was only the lesser part of her discomfort. The empty streets left Natalie feeling rather exposed, and she was unable to shake the feeling that she were being watched. She suspected that it was just the overzealous imagination of an anxious mind, but that knowledge did little to soothe her concerns. At least the cold gave her an excuse to keep her head down, and avoid meeting anyone’s eye.

The bank, when she finally arrived, felt like an oasis in the middle of a frozen desert. As soon as Natalie stepped through the automatic door out front, she was enveloped by warmth. The bland two-tone carpet and beige walls were a lesson in conformity, and she couldn’t hear anything louder than the clacking of keyboards and the muted whispers of private conversation. It was almost entirely empty, aside from the staff, and seemed to radiate tranquillity. Natalie allowed herself a moment to catch her breath, before finally approaching the nearest free teller.

What happened next was, without a doubt, one of the quietest arguments Natalie had ever experienced in her life. Their discussion started off civil, but things quickly escalated when the lady behind the desk kept trying to insist she was unable to help unless Natalie was able to produce her I.D or bank card. Natalie lost track of how many times she had to repeat the fact she had lost both her wallet and phone, and couldn’t go and get a replacement license without withdrawing money first. The teller’s tone was never anything less than polite, but her pointed gaze and forced smile made it clear how annoying Natalie’s repeated insistence was becoming. Natalie, by contrast, kept her voice low, if only to avoid drawing attention, but made no attempt to hide her growing displeasure.

The issue was resolved only when the teller was fed up enough to pass the issue on to her manager. After a little more debate, he reluctantly accepted the slew of private details Natalie offered up as proof that her story was genuine, and reluctantly issued her with a replacement. It had been close to an hour by the time Natalie was finally able to leave the bank behind, but she could take some small solace in the fact that she had overcome the day’s first real hurdle.

At this point, Natalie’s real concern was if the people hunting them would be able to track her now. She didn’t know how far their operational reach extended. Would they be able to access transaction history, or pull the security footage from the cameras of the various places she visited? It sounded like a stretch, but if it were possible, those sorts of records would make it easy for them to find her again. Every purchase she made would be like an arrow on their map, pointing directly to her. It was a worrying concept, but Natalie quickly pushed the thought from her mind. They didn’t really have any other choices – neither of them could go without food, or clothes, and they’d need a great deal more help than that if they were to find a way out of this mess. She’d simply have to take the risk and hope for the best…or that they would be able to overcome the consequences, when they did come.

Natalie made her way to the nearest phone store next. Now that she had money, the next transaction would hopefully go a lot smoother. It wasn’t long until she walked back out again with a cheap burner phone, complete with prepaid sim card. She went for the essentials next – some groceries, writing tools that they could use for their magic, and a few changes of clothes for herself. She briefly contemplated buying some for Luuk too, but quickly dismissed the thought. He’d managed to bring a few sets from his dorm, surely, and she could only make a rough guess as to his sizes.

It was only later that evening, after Natalie had bought everything she had been able to think of, that she finally headed for home. The going was slower this time, now that she was carrying several very full shopping bags. Even so, she couldn’t help but feel a sense of satisfaction. She had managed to get everything she had wanted, and nothing had gone wrong. Not so far, at the very least. So long as Luuk was okay, then she’d consider the day well-spent. Even the wind was unable to dampen her good mood. Perhaps things weren’t as bad as-

Is he following me?

The thought struck Natalie like a thunderbolt, when she was just around the corner from their motel. Yes, now that she thought about it, she was almost certain that she had glimpsed the same man wandering around in her general vicinity several times today. Was he one of them? Was she leading him back to Luuk right now? The mere suggestion was enough to make her break out in a cold sweat. She kept walking, trying to act natural, whilst her mind scrambled for a solution. Or, at the very least, a way to confirm her suspicions. On little more than a whim, she decided to keep walking straight past their motel. Several tense seconds and metres later, she decided to do a lap of the block, and circle back around the way she had come. That way, the man wouldn’t have any justifiable reason to follow her. If he kept tailing her then, she’d know something was up.

She turned the first corner, and resisted the urge to look back over her shoulder. She turned the second, and finally risked a glance. She caught sight of the man, wandering down the sidewalk, staring at his phone. He had headphones in, and didn’t raise his eyes, but that all could be part of his cover. She turned the third, and…he kept walking straight. The man looked up just long enough to make sure that there were no cars coming and crossed the road, his path finally taking him in another direction. Natalie did her best to avoid staring as she watched him go, and was finally able to relax once he was out of sight. She let out a tense breath, before a chuckle slipped from her lips. A laugh of relief, and gentle self-mockery. Chiding herself for being so jumpy, she finally turned around and headed back to the motel good and proper.

Getting in the front door proved a slight challenge, with her hands full with the bags. Natalie was forced to set them down for a moment, so that she could spend a moment rummaging through her now-full pockets. Once she’d managed to unlock the door, she tucked the key away, pushed it open, and moved to reclaim her bags. Only then, once she turned around and stepped over the threshold, did she catch sight of Luuk. A smile flickered over her face at the sight.

“I think I got everything we needed” she offered by the way of greeting. Natalie was, of course, totally oblivious to the fact that he had been waiting, and she had never gotten his text. She took a few steps over towards the bed and dumped her shopping bags down atop it, before taking a moment to shake her arms out. “I got everything I could think of, at the very least. Come, have a look. Maybe you’ll remember something I forgot.”

[Ashen]

The minutes ticked by ever so slowly, and Luuk struggled to focus on anything other than Natalie’s silence. He kept watching his phone, waiting for her name to poop up on his screen. As a distraction, he tried scrolling through social media, viewing all the updates on people he could not yet reach out to. Some of his classmates were already posting graduation photos taken around campus, early to avoid the traffic of the rest of their class. Seeing all the smiling faces and graduation caps sent a sadness clutching to his chest. His graduation, his accolades; would they matter now? How long would they spend here? Long enough to become someone new? Luuk tried to think of the overwhelming list of things he would have to say goodbye to if he had to adopt a new identity, and when his hands started trembling, he tossed his phone away from him on the bed. Then, remembering Natalie, he reached for it again to check if she had responded.

He got up to start pacing. “Well,” he said to himself, hating the silence permeating the room, “you could practice your magic. Make yourself useful.” He found a rock playlist online to drown out his frantic thoughts, and he retrieved the pen he and Natalie had used the day before. Then, Luuk spent several minutes drawing different circles onto his arm before realizing he needed something to change, an object for his magic to act on. He looked around the room for something simple enough that he could change without Natalie’s help when he heard the lock in the door shift.

Luuk was alert in an instant, pen extended in front of him as if it were a weapon, watching to see who came through the door. When he saw Natalie, his whole body visibly relaxed. She had come with bags, and he started towards the door to help her. “Why didn’t you reply?” he said, accusatory without meaning to be, but one look in her eye reminded him of yesterday, of what had happened, of how she’d had to leave her phone at home. She had never even gotten his text. All his worrying, his paranoia at what had happened to her; Luuk could have laughed at himself if he felt up to laughing. He shook his head dismissively and mumbled a simple, “Never mind.”

She had brought many things, and Luuk wondered how she was able to carry it all without falling over. Curious, he peered into one and found some shirts, likely in Natalie’s size. In the frenzy of the past twenty-four hours, it hadn’t even occurred to him that Natalie had nothing else to wear, while he had a whole bag full of clothes he could have shared. He suddenly felt bad at not offering her at least a hoodie to sleep in. She had also bought food, things easy enough to make without a full kitchen. Luuk wanted to repay her, to cover half the expenses he was making, but he didn’t know how to offer, and he knew she would say no anyway. So he swallowed the thought, brought her new clothes over to her bad, and remarked, “Looks like you were able to get your bank stuff settled. Good. I think… I think you got plenty, yeah. Thank you.”

His attention was pulled to the plastic bag sitting by his bed, the one he’d brought from his dorm, and Luuk hesitated. “I went back,” he admitted quietly, intentionally vague even though he knew Natalie would know what he meant. “I… hated this place’s soap, so I went and got my own. I didn’t stay long. No one saw me.” He hesitated. “Except for one of my professors, the one I told you about? He seemed concerned, but I… I couldn’t tell him anything.” Luuk didn’t know why he wanted to tell her that, but he felt it important enough to mention. Looking back over the room, with all its new contents, it was starting to feel more real. They really were preparing to spend a long while here. Luuk swallowed the complaints he had, shook his head clear, and turned his attention back to Natalie. “So,” he said, “can I help you unpack?”

[Namingtoohard]

Once Luuk confirmed that she hadn’t forgotten anything blatantly obvious, Natalie finally felt as if she were able to relax. After the ‘close encounter’ she had just experienced, the teacher didn’t particularly feel like making a second trip to the shops to pick up anything she had forgotten. Quite the opposite, really. Natalie felt as if her nerves had been scraped raw by her own paranoia, and even the knowledge that it had been a false alarm wasn’t quite enough to soothe her. Not completely. Nothing delighted her more than the idea of a quiet night in, passed without any further incidents. A single glance at Luuk – at the circles he had painted on his arm – seemed to suggest that he felt the same way, and she was rather looking forward to joining him in practicing.

With the matter settled, Natalie quickly set about sorting through her bag’s contents. She made a show of putting away everything she could, in the few places that their sparse rooms allowed. She tucked clothes into the wardrobe and pens into the bedsides tables, moving with the steady efficiency of somebody with nothing better to do. Her work came to a halt only when Luuk spoke up next, causing the woman to hesitate. She…wasn’t sure how she felt about the idea of a return trip, honestly. If their aggressors knew they had escaped, they were probably watching Luuk’s rooms to see if he returned. Was there a chance he had led them back here, in much the same way she had feared doing just a few moments ago? After a few seconds, however, she quickly decided against voicing such thoughts. They had no way of knowing regardless, and there was no point stressing him out about something neither of them could change. She’d just have to count the blessings they did have, and hope for the best.

“As long as you didn’t let anything important slip, then I guess there’s no point worrying. Now, why don’t you see if you can’t find some place to put these box meals?”

The rest of that night was entirely uneventful, thankfully, as were the next couple of days. It wasn’t long before Natalie felt like the two of them had gotten used to living together, and had fallen into a rhythm of sorts. An informal routine that lent their unfortunate situation an unexpected feeling of consistency and normalcy. One that felt totally at odds with their current situation whenever she stopped to consider it. Natalie began to feel comfortable there, almost, in that cheap little motel room.

Still, Natalie knew that staying put for much longer wasn’t a good idea. The two of them would be safer if they kept moving around, even if she wasn’t certain where else they would go just yet. Another shabby motel on the other side of town, if worse came to worse, and they didn’t come up with a better plan beforehand. And so, it was with a measure of reluctance that she informed both Luuk and the motel’s owner that the next night here would be their last.

The two of them were up bright and early the next day. Not by choice, but so that they had time to eat breakfast and pack before the motel’s outrageously early check-out time. Natalie knew that sort of thing was the industry standard, but that knowledge did little to flush the grit from her eyes, or wash the heaviness from her limbs. Even so, as best as she could tell, they were ready to go. She’d double-checked that they had packed everything they would need, and that they’d transformed all of the room’s locks back into their original forms. There was nothing left to hint at their passing, aside from their names in the ledger.

With approximately ten minutes left until they had to vacate the room, Natalie sat atop her now-former bed, with her packed bag sitting next to her. Her hands fiddled with her burner phone idly whilst she stared off into space, contemplating – and dreading -the one task she was yet to complete. One that she should have done days ago, but had kept putting off. Natalie had tried to justify the delay with excuses about how it was safer this way, left until the last possible moment before they left this room behind forever. Now there was nothing holding her back, and still she hesitated. There was no more excuses she could use to justify her fear. Her only remaining option was to confront it.

She took a deep breath, as if to steady herself, and hit the dial button.

Natalie listened to the phone ring for several long seconds. The longer it went on, the more she began to hope that the other person wasn’t going to answer. Her hopes were dashed at the very last moment, just before the call timed out. The ringing ceased, and was quickly replaced with the same distorted voice that she had come to dread.

“Natalie. I was wondering if we’d be hearing from you any time soon.” Both strange and familiar at once, the scrambled tone never ceased to make the hair on the back of her neck stand on end. Natalie suddenly found that her mouth was incredibly dry, and she had to force herself to swallow before she spoke.

“You were the one who sent them after me, then.”

“Who else?” The voice sounded amused, somehow, despite the strange disguising effects. When she failed to answer, it continued. “We had an arrangement. You broke it. Did you really think there wouldn’t be consequences?”

“Frankly, I didn’t expect you to notice.”

“How much more insolent you’ve become, now that the gloves are off.” A pause. “We’re prepared to offer you a deal, Natalie. Turn yourself over to us, and we’ll let your new apprentice live. He can serve as your replacement. Continue your work, with the same restrictions.

That caught Natalie slightly off-guard, and she hesitated briefly as she considered the offer. If she had a chance to give Luuk his life back, then didn’t she owe him that much? She’d be able to repay her debt to him, and receive fair penance for the atrocities she had committed, in one fell swoop. Even so, a part of her mind protested. Luuk wasn’t ready for that sort of work yet, and hopefully never would be. It wouldn’t be fair for her to condemn him to a life working to fix her mistakes. Besides, how did she know that these people would keep their word? Either way, she needed to buy herself some time to think.

“He’s not ready to work on his own.”

“He’s a smart guy. He’ll figure it out. Or you can keep trying to teach him, I suppose, and pray that you both live that long.”

“I…I’ll think about it.”

“When you decide to do the smart thing, you know how to get in touch.”

The line went dead, and Natalie let the phone fall away from her ear. That…hadn’t gone anything like she’d been expecting, and now she had a great deal to think about. At least the call had served its purpose, and confirmed some of her suspicions. She’d sort the rest our later, once she had more time to think. For now, they had to get going. She rose to her feet and tossed the burner phone into the waste basket, before shouldering her bag. Without any further ado, Natalie slipped from the room, locked the door behind her, and started making her way to reception.

[Ashen]

Admittedly, living with Natalie had been weird. It reminded him of living with his mother, though in much more cramped quarters, and Luuk often felt that he was in the way of her living her life. They had quickly fallen into a routine, and though the tension in their room was always high, Luuk had learned to ignore it, at least for the most part. He made very few trips outside, and instead he spent most of his time practicing his magic, or reading, or even doodling in the blank spaces of his notebook. He found he no longer had the attention span for things he used to do: his video games made him jumpy, his shows made him antsy, and even browsing social media left him with a deep sense of dread. He had had to silence his phone, opting to stay ignorant of the people concerned about him. He didn’t know what to say to them, or when he would get a chance to explain, and he thought for now it was better that everyone be left in the dark.

When Natalie announced to him that they’d have to move again, Luuk accepted the news in silence. Again he had to pack up his life and pretend he had never been here at all. He hoped this would not become a part of their routine, but he couldn’t cope. They were wanted, and they were safe nowhere. As Luuk packed, he considered the possibility of their enemies finding them while they were moving, but he tried to swallow the thought. Worry about unlikely scenarios would only make him more paranoid, more obvious to any onlookers. He shoved his thoughts to the back of his mind.

On the morning of their move, Luuk and Natalie woke up all too early to be out by the time they were expected to be. Luuk tried hard to wash the bags from under his eyes, then glanced around the room they were leaving. Their magic had already been undone, their bags packed. He tossed a bag over his shoulder, juggled others between his hands, and with everything set, he shuffled down to reception. Even though he’d triple checked that they’d left nothing, he let Natalie investigate for herself.

While waiting for her, he finally dared to check his phone. He hadn’t turned it on since charging it last night, in case anything happened he told himself. Familiar logos flashed across his screen upon startup, and when thy fell away, he flinched at the notifications pouring in. His inboxes were brimming with new emails, texts, missed calls, and voicemails. For the first time in his life, he was popular, and he might have laughed if the notifications weren’t overwhelming him. He cleared away what notifications he could, sifted through the news—a habit he had picked up over these last few days—and, when he was starting to wonder what was taking Natalie so long, he looked up to find her walking towards him, finally ready to go.

She had yet to tell him the truth about all this. Luuk had been waiting for it, waiting to return to the conversation they had abandoned that day, but Natalie hadn’t breached the subject, and he didn’t dare put her on the spot again. He felt like a dog being dragged around, obedient but not understanding. He knew Natalie was just as stressed as he was, and adding to that would only bring them both closer to cracking under the pressure. But his heart ached with the loss of his life, his freedom, and the start of this new path he did not understand. Maybe, he hoped, in their next motel, in their next room, Natalie would be comfortable enough to offer an explanation.

They made their journey quietly, Luuk’s thoughts too much of a whirlwind to have a proper conversation. He was wary of all the people they passed on the way to their new place, and he resented himself for it. They arrived at their motel, checked in, and went up to their room to put their bags down. Luuk took both keys and instantly got to work changing the locks. This, too, would be part of their routine, but as he set the new wards, he hoped he would not have to do this again.

Once the room was reinforced with the power of their joint magic, Luuk fell into one of the beds. He had been eerily quiet today, too lost in thoughts he did not know how to express. He dared a glance towards Natalie, trying to determine how she was handling their move, but her expression gave little away. He hesitated, then asked, voice small, “Can you teach me magic I can use as a weapon?” He looked to the door, as if someone in the hall outside would be able to overhear his whispers. “Just… you know, in case. I wouldn’t have to use it, of course, because we’re safe here.” Hs confidence wavered; he didn’t believe what he was saying. “I’d just like to know how to defend us, if we needed it.”

He knew he still had a lot to learn. Though he had had little else to do these past days but practice, he knew Natalie held years, decades of experience over him, and he wanted to learn as much as he could from her while he was still able. He didn’t know when he would have to use it against someone, but the idea wasn’t as farfetched as it once had been. He even wondered if perhaps he’d have to use his magic against his teacher, though guilt clutched his throat at the thought. His gaze fell to the floor. “We can do it later,” he suggested, realizing he should have given her some time to wind down. He had plenty to put away in the meantime, though his hands instead reached for his backpack, for the notebooks tucked away, eager to keep practicing.